Dear Hadi,
Salam Alaikum brother,
I come from a non practicing Muslim background family that did not teach me anything about Islam (due to not having a father figure and mother trying to do her best to bring food to the table), therefore I consider myself a Revert.
I am very shameful about what I'm about to ask so please bear with me...
I have become an Alcoholic, to the point that I often drink a strong beer in the morning as breakfast and easily drink anywhere between 8-12 strong beers a day + wine at night to be able to sleep. I am what we call a functioning alcoholic as I am not violent and still able to do my work during the day... This kill's me, because I'm afraid to Pray while I am under the influence of alcohol therefore I don't even pray anymore.
Ramadan is around the corner, and I swear, I want to do it but I'm afraid that I would relapse... should I do Ramadan even if I Relapse? Should I Pray knowing that I might be under the influence? What would be the right path?
These questions are shameful, and my apologies for asking these questions.
Thank you.
Dear Drinking and Ashamed,
Thank you very much for having the guts to ask such a personal question, and to put yourself out there like that. That shows that you really care, and that is the most important first step.
We have answered two very similar questions to yours, and would like to refer you to those. Please see the answer in our prior column:
If I can't stop drinking, should I stop praying
After you have read that column, and the second column that is referenced in that answer as well, we hope your heart will feel more comfortable in God’s mercy, and that you will feel comfortable with our brief synopsis here:
Make your first step trying to lessen drinking around the prayer times. Remember, alcohol in Islam was prohibited in two stages, with the first stage telling the believers not to approach their prayers while intoxicated (Quran 4:43):
“O YOU who have attained to faith! Do not attempt to pray while you are in a state of drunkenness, [but wait] until you know what you are saying…”
So, the way we interpret this is that you should not pray while you are so intoxicated that you don’t know what you are saying. The impetus here was to get people to begin giving up alcohol by not being drunk around prayer times, and not to get them to not pray since they might be drunk. You say that you are able to work, and so we feel you probably have a level of sobriety that will also allow you to pray.
If you feel that you are totally unable to understand what you are saying in the prayer because you are totally drunk, then wait until you know what you are saying, and then make up that prayer.
Regarding the fasting, we are not quite sure what you mean when you say you are afraid you will relapse, so we will talk about two scenarios, and hope that one of them covers what you mean.
If you are afraid that you will be fasting but end up breaking your fasting because you are drinking, then we feel you should still try to fast – that is better than just not fasting. If you end up drinking, try to lessen the amount. Also, just because you broke your fast by taking one drink doesn’t mean you now also need to eat and drink more, etc.
The basic idea is to do the best you can given your situation at the moment (Quran 64:16):
“So be mindful of Allah to the best of your ability, hear and obey, and spend in charity—that will be best for you. And whoever is saved from the selfishness of their own souls, it is they who are truly successful.”
Remain conscious of God – have Taqwa – to the best of your ability – that is the obligation.
As you hopefully seek professional treatment, AA therapy and so on, your ability will increase isA.
Now to the second possible scenario. If you mean that you are now “on the wagon,” and you are afraid that the stress of fasting will cause you to fall off the wagon and relapse into drinking, that is a tough one. Only you can judge that risk. While it is difficult for us to tell you not to fast, and while we do not give fatwas, just advice and opinions, we feel that we can turn to the Quran again in this matter, looking at the fasting verse in Surat al-Baqarra Quran 2:184, where the Quran gives allowances to those who are unable to fast:
“Fast a prescribed number of days. But whoever of you is ill or on a journey, then let them fast an equal number of days (after Ramaḍân). For those who can only fast with extreme difficulty, compensation can be made by feeding a needy person (for every day not fasted). But whoever volunteers to give more, it is better for them. And to fast is better for you, if only you knew.”
We believe that alcoholism is a disease, and therefore, if you would fall off the wagon from the stress of fasting, you can consider taking the illness allowance and paying in charity to feed a poor person for each day you do not fast, until isA you find treatment and attain long-lasting sobriety and can resume the obligation of fasting.
Once again, we give this only by way of advice and in a guarded fashion, since the Quran says: “And to fast is better for you, if only you knew.”
Please remember, alcoholism is a disease, not a matter of “will power.” The body becomes physically addicted to alcohol, and this requires professional treatment. Perhaps the commitment of fasting will help you with the needed discipline to seek treatment, attend regular AA meetings, and isA attain long-lasting sobriety.
May God bless you in this difficult struggle.