Dear Hadi,
I am a bit embarrassed, but here goes.
I have been married for about five years, and my husband is a nice man and a good Muslim.
However, over the last few months, he has been making comments that make me think that he wants me to get breast implants.
He hasn’t said so in so many words, but when we see someone who has obviously had such work done, he’ll make a comment like “that would look great on you -- very sexy.”
This has started making me feel a bit bad about myself and upset with him.
Is this something I should consider?
I never thought I would consider it, but now I’m actually thinking about it.
How do I proceed?
Dear Implant Dilemma,
First, you have nothing to be embarrassed about.
Rather than us calling your husband a cad and asking, “How dare he?” we trust your assessment that he is a good Muslim expressing something he may be interested in you considering.
So, let’s think about what he’s asking you to consider.
As you’re probably aware, most Muslim scholars frown upon, if not outright prohibit, cosmetic surgery that is not done to correct a particular impairment or significant deficiency.
Your question does not seem to describe either of these conditions.
If your current breast size is not causing you significant physical or emotional distress (and it doesn’t sound like it has until your husband’s recent comments), we would advise you not to have this procedure.
Now, back to your husband’s comments, we encourage you to have an open and frank conversation with your husband about the situation.
While he may be sharing something he would personally desire, you need to share how his comments have impacted you.
One wonders how he would feel if you saw a very muscular man and commented to him how good pectoral implants might look on him.
There’s a reason the Quran advises us to lower our gaze.
In peace.