|
How can we be so sure? |
Post Reply 
|
| Author | |
Lost-Soul 
Starter 
Joined: 24 December 2008 Location: Ireland Status: Offline Points: 1 |
 Post Options
 Thanks(0)
 Quote Reply
 Topic: How can we be so sure?Posted: 24 December 2008 at 6:23pm |
|
Hello, I have some questions I'm struggling with, and I hope someone might help me. But before I begin I must tell you a little about myself.
I am a muslim, Born and raised. My parents are good, clean people with an amazingly strong faith; and who have raised me in the best way they could. Until the age of 17. I was a good muslim, who prayed, fasted and wore the hijab.
When I turned 10, we moved from a muslim country to a non-muslim one (Europe). I found myself in a place where I often had to explain my beliefs to interested people, but soon I grew to feel that I was simply regurgitating things my dear parents taught me. I believe in Allah, there's no doubt in my mind about that.... but within that lies my struggle. I often wondered, Does God decide everything that happens to us or do we? If so, do we get punished for things we had no hand in? Would that be fair? If life is so different now than 1400 yrs ago, is God's evaluation of our lives, the same? and would that be fair?
I must admit, as a college student, I have strayed far from the rules of Islam. I am not proud of this, but I find myself not exactly ashamed either. I think about my parents and wonder, do they deserve to be punished for what I did? would that be fair?
In my straying away from Islam, I leaned things about people, life and myself that helped me see the world in a clearer way; things which I would have not learned otherwise. Am I still condemned to Hell for them? I want to return to God, to have that peace of mind....... But I wonder, is there a place for me there? Society seems to be far less accepting.
I find myself quite reluctant to give up my old life, friends, career! In that world, seedy and murky as it is, I feel far more accepted and less watched and judged! I feel lost! The hardest part is..... I find it difficult listening to someone who has a strong faith, like my dear mother..... her faith is unwavering. She simply cannot understand where my confusions lie. She once told me that I've questioned Islam and faith from a young age...... that got me to think, was shaitan leading me to the wrong path from the age of about 6-7? How could I have stopped it at that age? Or was it just a part of me that I need to embrace? but then, where does that leave me?
I apologise for rambling. I'm quite lost and confused. I'm wondering if there's someone out there who had this struggle and found their way back. How can I?
|
|
 |
|
|
Chrysalis
Senior Member 
Joined: 25 November 2007 Status: Offline Points: 2033 |
Post Options
Thanks(0)
Quote Reply
Posted: 25 December 2008 at 10:58am |
|
Hello Lost Soul . . .
Its not strange or unheard of to feel fluctuations in Imaan and Faith . . . at some point in our lives. What matters is that we realise our declining Imaan, and catch ourselves before the point of no return.
I have struggled with faith at times, not with Islam per se - but aspects of it . . . so I can kind of understand what you mean.
Allah is All-Forgiving . . . and it is never too late to turn back to Him and repent. You can start by praying to Allah, and asking for forgiveness, and ask for help regarding your Faith and Imaan. . . .
And some people are naturally curious and questioning, and dont just accept things they've been taught - you are probably one of those people, that does not mean you have been detsined to be led astray by Shaitan. Just channel this 'questioning' into something positive, and explore Islam, and ask questions about things that confuse you. You could try posting some questions here, or find a knowledgable source online perhaps. Belief with understanding is so much better for than blind faith . . . makes u feel much better, and you cant go wrong.
As for your parents, they did thier job raising you right, they cant be held repsonsible for your concious acts. . . as long as they did thier job, thats all they will be held accountable for.
Just dont be a pessimist and think all is lost, and you're hopeless - nobody is perfect, the door to forgiveness and Imaan is always open 24-7, use that option.
And yes, change is going to be hard, and confusing, at first. And it will take a bit of willpower from you. . . but then everything will fall into place, nobody can expect to turn over a new leaf overnight. . . . atleast try your best. As for "friends" and society . . . they are the ones that are the usually the BIGGEST hurdle to a positive change, especially a spiritual one, can tell you from my own experience. Just ignore them . . . friends and society is not going to be there when you need them, like at the day of judgement.
May Allah ease your troubles, and help you gain hidayath, and give you strong Imaan . . . Ameen,
|
|
|
"O Lord, forgive me, my parents and Muslims in the Hereafter. O Lord, show mercy on them as they showed mercy to me when I was young."
|
|
|
|
|
seekshidayath
Senior Member 
Female Islam Joined: 26 March 2006 Location: India Status: Offline Points: 3357 |
Post Options
Thanks(0)
Quote Reply
Posted: 25 December 2008 at 5:34pm |
|
As Salamu Alaikum Welcome to boards of discussions at Islamicity
 My dear sister, you have done a very good thing by placing up all your thoughts. I hope, by doing this, you cud understand yourself better and come out of confusions going within you. You must have felt bit lighter, but must be eagerly waiting for replies since morning. I regard this as a favour & blessing from Allah swt, that you realised that you wished to return. Infact, this sort of situation is experienced by many of us.
To start with the discussion, let me congragulate you for being blessed with such parents. Alhamdullilah. Its the basic teachings of there 's that today you realised, that you are not okay. Is n't it We wish to see the world around us, we get innovative, and feel we are now very matured, that we don't need help/suggestion of our parents, and thus, step there position in our hearts,{unintentionally}, below friends in our life. Now, its the friends and the environment that also matters. For a muslim its necessary that he gets associated with people of his own faith and thus, strenghthen his own faith. Now coming to your question, Does God decide everything that happens to us or do we? If so, do we get punished for things we had no hand in? Would that be fair? If life is so different now than 1400 yrs ago, is God's evaluation of our lives, the same? and would that be fair? Your question is about destiny and freewill. Its so simple.Let me start up with an example often cited. By the academic year-end, does a teacher not know, which of his student is going to pass and fail. He can guess, by knowing a student's intellect, his capacity or by examining him thru different ends whole year, that this student is going to pass and so and so shall fail. Is n't it ? Like wise, Allah swt who is the Creator of us, knows us very well. We are not completely master of fate. There are somethings determined by Allah swt , like our birth, death, and other important matter of life. And again we are given FREE-WILL. A choice to choose between good and bad. And here comes the path we choose. And so we are held responsible for the choices we make. Allah says in Qur'an , " That man can have nothing but what he strives for;", "Then shall anyone who has done an atom's weight of good, see it! And anyone who has done an atom's weight of evil, shall see it. " So, do we seek help from Allah swt to guide us towards righteous path i.e to make choices. We shud n't blame destiny/fate, but be practical and leave a life of freedom and choices. It happens that we human beings, called as "Insaan" which is derived from "nisyaan" meaning, forgetfulness, out of forgetfulness, commit sins. And get strayed away from right path. Right ? Don't we all commit sins. All human beings, did/do commit sins. And the Merciful Allah , has opened His doors of forgiveness for us provided we repent. The reason, why satan was thrown out was, he did not repent. WHile Quran clearly explains us that Adam AS, did repent. That is the difference. We are to repent for the sins we commit. Here are few ayahs and hadiths that shall give you the best explanation Edited by seekshidayath - 25 December 2008 at 5:37pm |
|
|
Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) said: �All the descendants of Adam are sinners, and the best of sinners are those who repent."
|
|
|
|
|
seekshidayath
Senior Member
Female Islam Joined: 26 March 2006 Location: India Status: Offline Points: 3357 |
Post Options
Thanks(0)
Quote Reply
Posted: 25 December 2008 at 5:36pm |
|
"Say: "O My servants who have transgressed against themselves! Despair not of the mercy of Allah" "And whoever does evil or wrongs himself but afterwards seeks Allah's forgiveness, he will find Allah Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful." "Know they not that Allah accepts repentance from His servants" "Verily, the hypocrites will be in the lowest depth (grade) of the Fire; no helper will you find for them. Except those who repent, and do righteous good deeds" "Will they not turn in repentance to Allah and ask His forgiveness For Allah is Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful" Al-Hasan Al-Basri, may Allah have mercy on him, said, "Look at this generosity and kindness! They killed His close friends but He still called them to repentance and forgiveness.'' There are many Ayat on this topic . Do these ayats not bring tears in you my dear sister. Read and re-read them. Allah swt is ready to forgive us. There is a hadith which says that a man killed ninety-nine people and completed the number one hundred when he killed a worshipper. He then asked a scholar if he has a chance to repent. The scholar said, "What prevents you from repentance'' The scholar told the killer to emigrate from his land to another land where Allah is worshipped. When he left his land and started on the migration to the other land, death overtook him on the way. The angels of mercy and the angels of torment disputed about the man, whereas the former said that he went out in repentance, while the latter said that he did not arrive at his destination. They were commanded to measure the distance between the two lands and to whichever land he is closer to, he will be considered part of that land. Allah commanded that the righteous land to move closer and the land of evil to move farther. The angels found that he died closer to the land that he intended to emigrate to by a hand-span, and thus the angels of mercy captured his soul. In another narration, when death came to that man, he moved his chest towards the righteous village that he emigrated to. Are your sins more than this man ? Even if they are, Allah 's mercy is above all. I remember an other hadith that Allah's Messenger saw a woman among the captives who was separated from her child. Whenever she found a boy (infant) among the captives, she would hold him close to her chest, as she was looking for her boy. When she found her child, she embraced him and gave him her breast to nurse. Allah's Messenger said: Do you think that this woman would willingly throw her son in the fire They said, "No, O Messenger of Allah!''
He said, (By Allah! Allah is more merciful with His servants than this woman with her son. SubhanAllah !!!. In one hadith , Prophet sallal lahu alaihi wasallam ,quotes Allah, the most Glorious says, "O son of Adam ! As long as you invoke me and beg forgiveness {with the hope that I will forgive} I will forgive all you sins and I don't care how many or how great they are, O son of Adam ! Even if your sins reached the height of the sky, and you turned to me in repentance. I will forgive you and I won't care". So my dear sister, there is way back for all of us. Hasten to return. Just seek forgiveness from Allah swt, the all Merciful, The forgiver, and The acceptor of forgiveness, who holds love 70 times greater than a mother. After sincere repentance, here are few things to follow, or make them part of your schedule, inorder to strengthen your faith 1. Recite Qur'an daily. 11. While, studying Islam, you may get lots of doubts/questions. Try to get them cleared, either by discussing it with your mother or, thru posting them here at IC.
May Allah swt help you ovvercome this struggle and strengthening of Imaan.
Edited by seekshidayath - 25 December 2008 at 5:38pm |
|
|
Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) said: �All the descendants of Adam are sinners, and the best of sinners are those who repent."
|
|
|
|
|
Hunter
Senior Member 
Male Joined: 02 December 2008 Status: Offline Points: 107 |
Post Options
Thanks(0)
Quote Reply
Posted: 25 December 2008 at 11:48pm |
|
Hello Lost-Soul. I don't think you're nearly as lost as you think you are. The simple fact that you're in here discussing it, is an indication that you want to return to Islam. What I'm hearing from reading your post (please correct me if I'm wrong), is that you want to return to your faith but you're not quite sure how. I think that now you're an adult, you may be able to re-discover Islam, and do it on your own terms, thereby making it yours, rather than feeling like you're simply regurgitating what you learned growing up. Not that I'm questioning what or how you were taught-- not at all. Simply that looking at Islam through critical adult eyes will give you a fresh new perspective. Far from being a negative, I think it would be a good thing. I'm 42, and I knew nothing of Islam until about two years ago. As for the seediness, I don't know you personally, but I'll guarantee I've got you beat. I've done many things in my life I'm not proud of, but I still think I'm a good person. The best advice I can give you right now is to listen to the suggestions of Chrysalis and Seekshidayath. They're two of the best people in here and they both know what they're talking about. Respectfully-- Hunter
|
|
|
"If you don't stand for something, you'll fall for anything"-- DrDre
|
|
|
|
|
Post Reply
|
|
Tweet
|
| Forum Jump | Forum Permissions You cannot post new topics in this forum You cannot reply to topics in this forum You cannot delete your posts in this forum You cannot edit your posts in this forum You cannot create polls in this forum You cannot vote in polls in this forum |
Topic Options