My brother left islam because....

msmashaAllah wrote: Asalaam wa Alekium brothers. As I look around I see that there are many women converting into Islam. Many of these women are African American. I want to know why is it so hard for converts to get married and why is it extremely hard for brothers to marry convert African American women.----

I tried to find contact with African women in the past through an African work mate, yet he struggles himself to find one. He is not muslim so the conditions are less than me, but now 1 1/2 year later he still looking.

I went to the dating site for few months. I chat a woman within weeks from singapore. Two weeks later I flew to singapore to meet her, she was a beautiful woman. Unfortunately there was something she did not mentioned in the profile which made us could not continue. I like her honestly, she is a beautiful.

Than I tried again making contact with malays, difficult. With arabs (easy I have no problem with them), with three indonesians, difficult (with broken communication, although one that regretted when I withdraw my approach). With african american, too far away they are all in america.

I think the people who are looking for partner in the internet most of them have personality problem and communication problem. But this is the best way at the moment to have a chat.

One advice if you like to join, please be honest and be communicative even when a person outside your criteria make contact. Be always polite.

Br. Usama Ameen!

I will take ion your suggestion and with that, I pray that Allah will guide me. Ameen!

As' Salaamu Alaikum Wa' Rahmatullahi Wa' Brakatuh

My apologies as I haven't posted here as I was caught up in the other sections and discussions. A little update. I haven't pursued anyone as of yet. Because the world is in the state where it is now "brothers like me" who struggle to find their mates will perhaps struggle by God's will. One of the brothers here mentioned that I should try to go to my local masjid to find a wife. Again its like the old saying when I was a Christian "Even the women at church can be devilish too" because one is at the mosque one is automatically holy or pious in the sense.

The sad part about this is that I get more appreciation everyday from non-muslim women that Muslim women. The same ambition is somewhat similare to "reverts in Islam" the ambition to understand seems to be greater within revert muslims than born, at least in general consensus that seems to be. The similarity between that and what I've experienced is evident. I don't try these Muslim sites that post women from different parts of the world because its like gambling in a way. I don't know what kind of woman I'll get.

The sad part about life is that sometimes even good people don't always get what they want. Even Jesus (AS) didn't marry during his mission. Although I'm not on the same spiritual plane as this prophet but what I mean is that not always good people are meant to be with other good people. The way some women of today are is saddening. I live in a society where its important to have money, and status and although not all Muslim women share this mindset, I have found a few in my time that do. I have found some Muslim women to believe that a man should have a well paying job, hence making the transition of their wifely duties easier.

I believe women should work and be independent of men.

Some Muslim women I've spoken with (of course on a cordial basis) have said that a Muslim man must have this and this and that.....

I believe that before somebody speaks of particular qualities they want in a person they should acknowledge the basic qualities a person should have such as a good heart, intelligence and kindness.

My story is a sob story in a way but its true sometimes I don't think I will find that one sometimes I do. But deep down I don't feel that I will marry a Muslimah because of the state of our world today...Not saying I don't want to but because of various reasons.