Who is my husband?

 

I'm posting this, on behalf of a sister who is beside me while I'm typing this.

 

She is a new revert, alhamdulillah. But is now in a dilemna. Two years ago, she met a practising bro online, being new in the deen, she chatted with the bro about islam and till the day they realized that they are personally closer than just bro and sis. So one day, the bro, went in front of the web cam, [after asking her permission/proposing to her] with two other brothers [as witness] and he said that they are getting married -- and that's done. THEY GOT MARRIED.

 

But she being new, didn't took it seriously and thought that the bro was just joking. She lives in US, and he lives in Jordan. Then the brother in Jordan, or Bro J. started  introducing her to relatives and friends through webcam, even to his students when he tutors at home.

 

Then communication cut, after a month of that "marriage" and then, six months later, Bro J. came back. And so here comes the dilemna of the sister.

 

Coz the sister met another guy, a Muslim too... and they got married unislamic -- through a non-muslim civil wedding --- with an agreement that she will help him -from other country too - go to US.  But things went beyond just that agreement, and became personal... Both wanted it to be a real/genuine family-building marriage. Although the guy wanted their marriage to be officiated by an imam and do it islamically, they got married in a place where the sister knows no muslim. so to have the paper done, they did the civil wedding.

 

Question is: Who her legal husband is? Both men are still far from her, but she's working on the paper of the latter husband. And she is in a stage wherein trying to live the right way but because first hubby is claiming her now, that confuses her.

 

First hubby is a practising bro, and she said, at some point was supporting her financially back then. [the bro disappeared after the marriage, coz he was jailed thru allegations that was not proven and he's freed already.]

 

Should she decide to keep the latter hubby, does she have to ask for divorce from the first one, they are communicating again these days, and the bro is willing to take her back, despite the situation that she's into. He's adamant that she's his wife, although no legal papers can be presented. Also, he's willing to let her help through papers so that the latter hubby can go to the US. The bro in Jordan, is not interested to live in the US, instead he wants her to go to Jordan.

 

The latter hubby is adamant too that she is her wife, coz he has a paper as a proof.

 

Hope to get your ideas, and please do keep the sister in your duas, as she is in a struggle to live the right way, inshaAllah and is presented with this trial.

 

Jazakhallahu khayran.

 

IMO while the 2nd marriage is legally valid both marriages are Islamically invalid. I think the sister should instead ask herself if she needs any of them, especially that green card guy.

 

Islam made things easy and simple but we got this habit of complicating simple things and oversimplifying complex issues. Marriage in Islam is a strong pledge (Mithaqun Ghalithun), a pledge as strong as that made between Allah and the Prophets. Now thats some serious pledging, we cant joke around and make a mockery of God's Laws.