To Muslim women...

Dear Nico,

Here is the correct meaning of the Qur`anverse 2:223 according the translating en commentary of Muhammad Ali:

" Your wives are a tilth for you, so go in to your tilth when you like,a and send (good) beforehand for yourselves. And keep your duty to Allah, and know that you will meet Him. And give good news to the believers."
223a. Anna means either mata, i.e., when, or kaifa, i.e., how (AH). As the previous verse prohibits certain relations when the woman has her courses on, this one states that keeping that prohibition in view, a man may go in to his wife when he likes and as he likes.

The Qur�an contains directions for the physical as well as the moral and spiritual welfare of man, and it deals with the most delicate questions in language unapproached in its purity in any other law dealing with similar questions. Many of the phrases dealing with the delicate relations of the sexes were introduced by the Holy Qur�an itself, and its literature is therefore one which brings no shudder to the fair reader, unlike many of the descriptions contained in the Bible. The comparison of the woman to the tilth is simply to show that it is she who brings up the children and through whom is made the character of the man, and to show that the real object of conjugal relations is not simply the satisfaction of carnal desires.

Salaam ( Peace ! )

Rahmat Ali


Edited by Rahmat Ali

Jazak Allah Khair Sister Herjihad for your wonderful response. 

The assumption Nico is making is that Islam permits rape; that is, Nico believes Islam permits a man to literally force his wife to have sex if he desires to have it and to force her to have sex with him in any manner that he desires without taking into consideration how his wife feels about the issue.  Nico obviously doesn�t know anything about the history behind this ayat and what it is referring to.  I strongly suggest to Nico that he/she go and learn about Jewish history and the common practice of the way a married couple had sex.  This ayat is a means to correct that practice.  Furthermore, the preposition, �Thus, you may enjoy this privilege however you like, so long as you maintain righteousness� is a conclusion.  We know this by the word �Thus� which it begins with.  It is a conditional conclusion:  A is true only if B is also true.  That is �you may enjoy this privilege however you like� is true only if �so long as you maintain righteousness� is also true.   So, the first part doesn�t contradict the second part at all.  The first part is actually conditional based upon the truthfulness of the second part.  If the second part is false, then the first part is necessarily false too.  In other words, a man can enjoy the privilege of having his wife however he likes only if he is able to maintain righteousness.  If he cannot maintain righteousness, then he is not allowed the privilege of having his wife however he likes.  This implies that a man must not only know what is righteous, he must be able to do what it is that is righteous.  Any righteous Muslim man will know that enjoying the privilege of having his wife the way he likes doesn�t entail rape.  In fact, he would know that it is not righteous to have his wife in any way that affects her negatively.  He should not want her to do something that would affect her Islamic haya. 

 

When I read Nico's comments I instantly got this image of a cave man in one of those old cave man cartoon where he simply goes up to a woman, knocks her over the head with his club, drags her to his cave and has her the way he likes.  It is very sad that there are people in this world who are so narrow minded to think that a faith based upon the Divine Revelation of God would condone such actions.  You can easily tell by a person's approach to Islam whether his/her approach is based upon some biased view that Islam is barbaric. 

 

Nico, I am a Muslim woman.  Despite the misconceptions of many individuals, Islam is not a faith that gives privileges to men and not women.  Women have rights over their husbands as well, especially in the area of sexual satisfaction.  The only reason a man has any degree over a women is based upon the fact this it is his duty to provide for her maintenance which includes to house her, cloth her, feed her and provide for the other things she needs.  Also, he is to do this in kindness.  Because men do this, they receive more inheritance than women do.  A woman�s money is hers and she need never spend it on her maintenance.  A man also has the ultimate say in important matters of family life.   This doesn�t mean that women are not allowed to have a say or that a man should not listen to their wife�s input.  It simply means that someone has to be the final decision maker.  To be honest with you, as a woman that was previously a non-Muslim, I truly believe the concept of marriage life in Islam is beautiful.  If an Islamic couple lives a righteous married life, there is no doubt they will enjoy a wonderful life of love, kindness, comfort and peace within a family unit that is well balance and blessed by God.

 

PAZ

Sister Khadija

Not to be apologetic, what is "disloyalty" you think is referred in Quran verse 4:34?