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SB1984 View Drop Down
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    Posted: 29 August 2014 at 2:52pm
Assalam walikum everyone,

Wondering if I can get some advice and support please. I've been married for 12 years it's was a forced marriage but I accepted it and tried giving my marriage a go. We have an 8 year boy. Things have always been difficult in our marriage he use to abuse me physically and now he abuses me emotionally and verbally. My husband hates spending time with now doesn't like looking at me and we sleep in separate rooms.

I've asked him several time what he wants he doesn't say anything besides giving me verbals. He doesn't want to separate but continue to live two separate lives.

I've come to a stage were I have some affections and love but don't want to go the wrong way about it.

There has been someone I've been speaking nothing else this person makes me feel good and I feel close to him. If my husband is not willing to give a divorce what can I do.    I really can not control my feelings and emotions and don't want to go the wrong ways
About things.


Please can you help. Jazakallah
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semar View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote semar Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 30 August 2014 at 12:31am
Wa alaikum salam,
 
You can go to judge, and tell the story. I think there is rule if a husband don't give your "need" for 6 month you have the right to divorce. The something with abusive.
 
However to go with "the new man" don't decide it now, because in your current situation any men will "look good", so wait for some time till cool down..


Edited by semar - 30 August 2014 at 5:20pm
Salam/Peace,

Semar

"We are people who do not eat until we are hungry and do not eat to our fill." (Prophet Muhammad PBUH)

"1/3 of your stomach for food, 1/3 for water, 1/3 for air"
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abuayisha View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote abuayisha Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 30 August 2014 at 7:58am
Originally posted by SB1984 SB1984 wrote:


I've asked him several time what he wants he doesn't say anything besides giving me verbals.


What are verbals? The emotional infidelity you are involved in must come to a complete stop until you are free from your marriage. Perhaps, for the sake of your son, your marriage can be salvaged. A little maturity and communication can go a long way to that end.

Edited by abuayisha - 30 August 2014 at 8:02am
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SB1984 View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote SB1984 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 30 August 2014 at 8:37am
Thanks for the advice. Who I say verbals I mean he keeps swearing I really feel down an currently in depression medication because of his emotional and verbal abuse.
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abuayisha View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote abuayisha Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 30 August 2014 at 5:48pm
You have redress both in the UK courts, and through your religion to leave the marriage, however why not first try marriage counseling? Perhaps whoever prescribed the depression medication can point you in the right direction. Has your family and his family been able to help?
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SB1984 View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote SB1984 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 31 August 2014 at 1:12pm
Yes they have many times but nothing has changed.
That's what's really sad.

I Don't want to break up my marriage but I'm not happy in this marriage and I think things will just get worse if we carry on living like this.
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