Zina

ASSALAMU ALAIKUM

Ayesha17, I�m sorry to inform you but if you did everything but have intercourse, than you still committed zina.  Why is it that so many Muslims think zina is only the act of sexual penetration?  All of the acts which lead up to the sexual penetration are also zina.  It is not simply with our private parts that we make zina.  We make zina with any of our body parts if we use that body part in a sexually lustful way outside of the sanction of marriage.    

I have had Muslim friends in other parts of the world who have told me the things they or their friends have done but they always end by sayings, �But it�s okay because we didn�t commit zina.�  Some of them even commit sodomy thinking this is better because it is not zina. 

What is wrong with this world?  How can we justify our actions like this?  How can anyone say that it is Islamic-ly okay to do anything with another person that is something that should only be done between a husband and wife?  If it is an act which Allah allows only between a husband and wife, then to do it with a person outside of wedlock is zina�even if you stop just short of sexual penetration.  We are not even permitted to do such acts (such as masturbation) to ourselves.  So, how can we think for even one second that we can do it with someone else? 

Ayeshai17, what you are saying reminds me of something the Prophet Muhammad (pbuh) said during his last sermon.  He said:

Beware of Satan, for the safety of your religion. He has lost all hope of that he will be able to lead you astray in big things, so beware of following him in small things.

What you are doing, and say you might do again, is to follow Shaytan because you perceive what you are doing to be small in comparison to �intercourse.�  But in reality, it is not just a small thing. 

I beg you to truly reflect upon what you are doing.  You need to make a choice.  Do you want to follow the way of Shaytan or Allah?  If you want to follow Allah, then you only have one choice; that is, repent and ask Allah for forgiveness.  To repent means that your promise to not repeat the behaviors is sincere.

If you notice in the above quote, the Prophet (pbuh) states that we have to beware of Shaytan for the safety of our religion.  This means that our religion�our deen�is safe only insofar as we actively choose to follow Allah and not the ways of Shaytan.  The Prophet�s (pbuh) words are also a warning that it is the small things which will be our undoing, so attend to the small things too.  Inshallah you will see that you are definitely at a crossroad, and Inshallah, you will make the right choice and stop dancing with Shaytan.

The ayat Brother Suleyman pointed out to you is clear warning of what will be your lot in Islam if you continue on the path you are on.  It saddens me to think you may do some things now that will affect your ability to have a good Muslim marriage in the future.  Please sister, think carefully on this matter.

ASHUKRU-LILLAHI RABBIL-ALAMEEN WALA-HAWLA WALA QUWATA ILLA BILLAH

ALLAH HAFIZ

Sister Khadija

Bismillah,

sometimes muslims judge a lot

Are you Muslimah, or Muslim bashing?  Sometimes everyone judges a lot. 

Why don't you take a deep breath, do a search on this forum for other people's dilemna's strikingly similar to yours, and see if you can find an balm to calm your heart. 

I've heard Morrocco is a nice place to live.  Maybe you should consider going home.