Having doubts about hijab |
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UmmAminata
Senior Member Joined: 21 October 2006 Status: Offline Points: 227 |
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[QUOTE=UmmTaaha]
Sister, why did the result of your faith not keep you firmly grounded on the straight path? Why did you waver because of people? The deen is for the worship of Allah alone. I agree that the deen is for the worship of Allah alone, but if your isolated, and people behave like their in a cult and your going through personal issues that can weigh very negatively on our eman and mental health. Alhamdilal, thats been years ago for me, and I'm a much mature Muslim. No one is worth my personal relationship with Allah. But I believe that it is unfair and unrealistic to ask a convert Muslim to remain firm in a situation in which her mental health is declining, and she feels physically unsafe. Safety is a human need and a human right. If I didn't feel safe in my hijab I would not wear it. I would go to a place where I could wear it. I saw a woman on t.v. who was physically assualted while she was pregnant. |
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Mrs. Dia
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UmmTaaha
Senior Member Joined: 10 August 2006 Location: Japan Status: Offline Points: 159 |
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Sister UmmAminata, Mabrook to you, you are a muslima. May allah always keep you strong and guided on His deen. Sister, this deen is for our felicitous salvation. It is not at all unfair for anyone to be asked to remain steadfast for the purpose, because that is the ultimate goal of every muslim. We should as muslim sisters be praying for each other and helping each other stay firm on the deen. We should ask eachother and encourage eachother to hold fast to the reigns that lead us to the utmost bliss. I understand your situation was testing. When we are tested, it is for a purpose. Allah wishes to draw us near. Sometimes He does so by giving us the tawfiq and himma to follow His commands, on others He sends trials to see if we are patient or not. Masha allah you return to Islam, because those who do not after a test or a trial, the loss is theirs, its not of the people or the situations which cause one to go astray. One should connect safety with la hawla wa la quwata illa billah. There is no might or power except with allah. These words are empty if we do not realise their meanings. None from amongst his creation can cause harm or do favor accept through the will of Allah. Obeying His commands in spirit and action, through the heart and the limbs habituate one to obey. After that it is the will of Allah if He keeps us safe, or tries us with hardships. Eid Mubarak!
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herjihad
Senior Member Joined: 26 January 2005 Location: United States Status: Offline Points: 2473 |
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Salaams Dear Sister, I'm so sorry that you are feeling depressed and isolated at times. Why don't you write to us, and you are welcome to write to me pm personally if you wish, to alleviate these difficult times when you are going through them? Please share what you need to to make things better. Remember that most of us humans go through difficult emotional times and that you are not the only one and are not alone. Forgive us for not being here for you in the past. ISA you had a nice, peaceful Eed today or whichever day you guys celebrated. Salaams |
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Al-Hamdulillah (From a Married Muslimah) La Howla Wa La Quwata Illa BiLLah - There is no Effort or Power except with Allah's Will.
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UmmAminata
Senior Member Joined: 21 October 2006 Status: Offline Points: 227 |
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Salaam o alaikum Sister Umm Taaha I respectfully disagree with your position. The young woman who was physically assualted in our area was a Muslima in hijab who was Eight months pregnant. I think that is totally extreme, and illogical to remain in a situation that is not mentally healthy and physically safe. The scholar that I follow says that it is okay to remove your hijab, however, you must work to put your self in a situation where you can practice your deen in the open, so you can not remain like that forever. That is a much more tolerant and balanced view. Also, I'm very aware what this is deen for. I'm not an ignorant Muslima. Just becuase a sister chooses to remove her hijab for valid reasons doesn't make her a kafir and doesn't mean her eman is low at all. The first thing Allah swt will ask us on the day of judgement is about our prayer. And I never left the deen, you misunderstood my post. I also don't believe that we have to suffer and poor in order to be a Muslim Allah is pleased with. Yes, we will be tested, and tried. Yes Allah is swift in punishment, but his mercy overcomes his anger. I don't worship a god ready to strike terror and pain any moment. I worship a God that is Al-Wadood, Al-Wasay, Al -Noor, Al- Hadi, Al- Malik, Al- Quddus and Al-Sabar. I'm very much aware of who my Master is and I'm very aware that I'm the slave. Your post felt like a "telling me off" post, and that's fine if it was. But nobody on this earth is keeping inventory for Allah. Salaam o alaikum |
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Mrs. Dia
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UmmTaaha
Senior Member Joined: 10 August 2006 Location: Japan Status: Offline Points: 159 |
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Walaikum assalam wa rahmatullah, I think in one of your posts you said that you had left the deen for sometime, in another thread, but it could be my mistake. I am sorry for the misunderstanding. I dont know what I have said that has made you react in "red and bold". I was positive in my post and was giving encouragements for practising insha allah. These days, advice to take the religion easy on yourself comes more readily than someone telling us to stand up as a guard against temptations and trials. Our stay in this world is temporary and life is short, thus I want to give people support through words that it takes a little effort but keep going, stay firm, and He will help you, because He is with those who are righteous ... If you did not like my advice, you are free to leave it, sister. Insha allah a few words on the internet are not hurting anyone. I dont know what telling you off really means ... Please correct yourself, I have never called anyone a kafir who is a muslim. That is a sin in Islam, may allah protect us from fragmenting the ummah through such accusations on fellow muslim brothers and sisters. This would be my last response to you on this topic insha allah. Assalamualaikum wa rahmatullah.
Edited by UmmTaaha |
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UmmAminata
Senior Member Joined: 21 October 2006 Status: Offline Points: 227 |
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I think in one of your posts you said that you had left the deen for sometime, in another thread, but it could be my mistake. I am sorry for the misunderstanding. The other thread you are mentioning is about a brother who returned to Islam. In that thread when I stated " Brother I've been where you've been and worse" I never said or claimed to have ever left the deen. What I did say is that I engaged my own doubt and uncertianty and used my critical thinking skills to explore Islam by reading from other points of view and exploring different faith communities. I did say I was teetering the very thin line of disbelief but never have I ever left this deen. These days, advice to take the religion easy on yourself comes more readily than someone telling us to stand up as a guard against temptations and trials. Our stay in this world is temporary and life is short, thus I want to give people support through words that it takes a little effort but keep going, stay firm, and He will help you, because He is with those who are righteous ... If you did not like my advice, you are free to leave it, sister. Insha allah a few words on the internet are not hurting anyone. Yes you are right, the internet isn't hurting anybody, at least not this woman. I felt you came off as very self righteous and sanctimonious in your posts. I was offended by your allegations I'd left the deen. And I understand being encouraging but just as you took issue with my advice and advised me to leave it, perhaps you can do the same. I'm training in Pastoral Counseling right now, and I'm never going to advise any Muslim to do something that they truly believe makes them physically unsafe. And if some one is truly suffering from depression, I'm never going to advise them to continue in a behaviour or choice that they may believe is triggering their depression until they process through the situation and can think clear headed about it. And finally, if some one is engaging in any act of worship that they are not confident in, and truly believe in, what is the point? Empy rituals and rigid rules? This is exactly why non-Muslims think the Muslim community is a community of extremist, fanatics, and illogical people. Disregarding common sense is a terrible shame. To the sister who started this thread, what ever you choose to do, only Allah can judge your intentions, and don't despair of Allah's mercy. Allah is so Great, and so Loving.
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Mrs. Dia
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J.R.
Groupie Joined: 25 June 2005 Location: United States Status: Offline Points: 87 |
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Assalamu Alaikum Sisters,
Mashallah, there is no doubt of the intelligence of you all. I know you are all saying what is in your hearts and you all equally have good intentions. Well I still am wearing my hijab despite that one day of going without it as I posted earlier. I agree that in extreme situations maybe the hijab would be permissable to remove. Although my mental health may still be at risk while I'm living in this town, I don't feel physically threatened. I have in the past been verbally assaulted by men in passing cars while walking to the sore alone. Since then I wear a hijab but a hooded sweatshirt over it so it doesn't draw so much attention. As long as my hair is covered who cares HOW it's covered. Obviously in the hot temperatures I'd look like an idiot walking aorund in a sweatshirt w/ the hood up! :) In that case I just didn't walk around alone outside. I thought about totally boycotting that mosque due to what the Imam suggested and just felt let down by lack of support by the Muslims. But recently I went back for Eid dinner. I feel I have to continue to show my point of view by showing up in hijab. I'm not judging anyone who doesn't wear it, but I guess for me I still believe in it enough to feel weird and disconnected without it. I also believe I should stand up for my faith and live my beliefs, not how others want me to live. If I followed that, then i'd still be in the faith I was raised with. Allah knows best. |
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UmmAminata
Senior Member Joined: 21 October 2006 Status: Offline Points: 227 |
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Alhamdilal Sister J.R. I'm glad to hear that you feel physically safe. I've seen sisters suffering from Post Trumatic Stress disorder and extreme Islamaphobia. I'm glad you have come to a place of peace, contentment, and self acceptance. May your continous journey to Allah, be what you hope for and ever more. |
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Mrs. Dia
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