To Be or not To Be

Question:

Are Muslim men allowed to marry non-Muslim women?
When you marry female people of the book and they turn out not practicing their own deen or even do not believe, what do you do. Given the fact that the fatwa classify them as Kafirs. Is there a problem of inconsistency there with the Quran which allows such marriage. Shouldn't the Quran take precedence here. The intent is to bring them to Islam. If after so many years one is convinced they will not believe what then do you do.

Cheri Powers, Lahore

Answer:

Assalam-o-Alaikum and thank you for contacting JI dear Cheri Powers,

Islam allows a Muslim male to marry a lady, either Christian or Jews � she should not be open polytheist. She is not obliged to convert to Islam for the sake of marriage. She will enjoy all the rights that a Muslim wife avails � proper willful contract, dower, right of nafaqa (sustenance) from husband, right of inheritance (if she gets widowed), and right of separation (khula�) if ever she so wants. And, the Qur�an ordains that wife � a Muslim or Christian � is equal partner to the marriage contract.

However, a Muslim lady can neither be married nor remain married to a non-Muslim, including one belonging to the "People of Book". If some Muslim sister has indulged in this, she should approach the husband and try her best that he also converts to Islam. Meanwhile she will NOT act as his wife and stay divorced. If after lapse of some time, the husband embraces Islam, they can however, unite again without fresh marriage, as such instances are reported in the "Seerah" and the decisions given was by the Prophet (SWS) himself. In case he doesn't embrace Islam, divorce is inevitable.

Yes, Qur'an gets precedence over all other opinions. Now you say that "these women do not even believe in or practice their own deen". Does that mean they were not truly Christian or Jew, and were therefore, wrongly taken to be ahle-kitab? If so, one should not have married such a lady in the first place. One thing however, is clear. If a true Christian or Jewish lady (married to a Muslim man) sticks to her deen, she is not be compelled to convert to Islam. Preferably however, after the marriage the family should move to Dar al Islam. That will enhance her chances to become Muslim or at least stay closer to the True Faith. More important that the children of such couple will be raised Muslims.

Regards

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Question:

Dear Sir,

I turn to you with the following question. I am Dutch, and Christian. I have married a Pakistani Muslim woman (as is permitted under Dutch civil law), and we are a happy family with two wonderful children. My wife is a practicing Muslim, as I am a practicing Christian. The children are raised with knowledge of, and respect for both the Christian and the Muslim religions. Our marriage is fully respected by both our families. Under pressure of her friends at the mosque, however, my wife starts to feel more and more apprehensive about the validity of our marriage. I am aware of the nullity of our marriage under Islamic law, but my question is: should such a marriage indeed be considered null and void, irrespective of the fact that it has resulted in a happy family with two children and respect for the two religions?
Regards,

Maurits Berger
Netherlands

Answer:

Thank you for contacting JI dear Dear Maurits Berger!

Let us be frank with you at the very outset. The marriage was certainly not valid under Islamic Law. The permission given in the Qur�an is only for a Muslim man to marry a chaste lady from the People of the Book (Jews and Christian). This facility was not available to a Muslim lady. You said she was a practicing Muslim and that her family had no objection to the marriage. It shows they either did not know the Law, or were not mindful of that.

Luckily you confessed that you "respect" Islam as well. What does that mean, however? Do you consider it was a true religion? Then what bars you from confessing it openly? Believe us, we are not taking advantage of your situation to suggest to you the acceptance of Islam. We are drawing from your own stated confession - an honest one, we believe, and that provides a ray of hope for the family.

Let us tell you something. Your wife, or any Muslim for that matter, will not be accepted as Muslim unless they declare un-conditional belief in the Prophethood of Jesus (peace be upon him) and the Book that was revealed to him. Will it be unfair then, if you were asked to have similar faith in Muhammad (peace be upon him) as the true Messenger of God, as he brought the same Message from the same God? You will need no "conversion". It will be re-affirmation of the true faith and teachings of Jesus (p.b.u.h.). Above all, it will give your family life (past and present) the legitimacy as required under the Islamic Law. Having done that, you will not need any fresh marriage contract, except to declare agreement to the relevant provisions under Islamic Law that speak about the rights and obligations of the spouses.

If you could believe, we shall be the last on earth to give even the least consideration to the idea of separation between you and your wife. If it was for me, we will go to any limits and do what we could to save that relationship, which is very dear to God as the Muslims are told. What however, we can not do - nor any Muslim can dare suggest - is to break the Law of God. Consider the merits of Islam, accept it happily and for God�s sake, and have your marital life saved, which, as you said, must be wonderfully happy.

We pray that God Almighty be your true Guide and help you through this ordeal. Ameen!

With best of wishes.

M. Haq

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Question:

Dear Sir,
I am a Christian female. My boyfriend is a Muslim. We intend to get married, I�ve never asked him to convert, he's never asked me to do so, but I know that he wants me to. Because of some family problems, when I couldn�t find any other way to be with him, I decided to convert. I haven't done so as yet, but somehow, I feel really awkward with this decision. Sometimes I just feel like telling him that I don�t want to convert, but he seems so happy with it, that I don�t have the heart to tell him so. His family and friends know that I will be converting, but as you said, its not necessary for a Non-Muslim female to convert. What should I do? Please help me out with this situation. I�m in great anxiety. Thanks.

Anonymous
Karachi

 

Answer:

Thank you for contacting JI dear Anonymous,
We never said that a non-Muslim lady should not convert of she wishes to marry a Muslim man. But we did say that a Christian and a Jew lady may not convert. She (as your case is) may stay what she is and marry the Muslim �boy� of her choice. This is a special privilege that Islam accords to Christianity and Judaism. Do you know why? Because Moses and Jesus and all prophets of the house of Israel and the rest of prophets (peace be on them all) were all Muslims. That we know for sure. Therefore we often request Christian and Jew to come back and embrace the true religion of the prophets. Muhammad (p.b.u.h.) never preached anything different from the past revealed Messages of Allah.

That said by way of clarification, you please should not convert as long as you are feeling un-easy. We know how difficult it is fro a person to change his/her faith. But then you will have double reward, if you do. Above all, it will ensure harmony and sustained understanding and affection with your spouse.

Let me repeat. You can marry the boy without converting. He should not press, because that is not required.
Wish you good luck.

M. Haq

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Question:

Are muslim men allowed to marry non-muslim (specifically hindu) girls?

Nasir
Canada

Answer:

Assalam-o-Alaikum dear Nasir, thank you for contacting JI.
A Muslim boy can NOT marry a Hindu girl. The Qur'an has allowed marriage with only a Jew or a Christian lady, who is noted as belonging to ahle-kitab. Some people refer to Muhammad bin Qasim, or the Umayad rulers in Damascus (Dimishq), who treated the Indian subjects as dhimis (like Jews and Christian), but that was only for the purpose of jidhya (revenue) extraction. That political decision can not be extended to the Qur'anic injunction of marriage permission.
Wassalam,

M. Haq