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bb43v3r View Drop Down
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    Posted: 25 September 2008 at 3:55am
Hello, i am new here, was searching for sites to help me out regarding Islam.
 
I need really good advisors here on my personal matter.
 
Introduction of myself, im a Christian from Malaysia and actually I am very confused about choosing my religion. Currently my faith is divided in between Christianity and Islam.
 
You see, i have a girlfriend and she is an Islam. We have known each other for a couple of years and my intention is to marry her.
 
According to Msia law i have to convert in order to marry and i dont know the religion much as i know mine since i am still reading books about Islam.
 
I need really good advise on this matter: -
 
1. I love her very much and I have promised her before (quite long already) that i will convert before i marry her but the problem is, it has taken me quite long to choose my religion as I am confused between choosing Islam and my old religion. It would be nice if both sides of religion can give me advises since i have read some topics with Christians & Muslems talking.
 
2. She says that if I convert for the sake of my love to her and not bcoz i want to become a Muslem she would not either bcoz I am not taking my faith correctly, which i agree.
 
3. She wants a husband that can bring her teachings of Islam, prayers and what islam is about. Which i am not capable of since i am still in the process of learning myself.
 
 
I would really appreciate all advises that comes in.
 
 
Thank you.
 
 
 
 


Edited by bb43v3r - 25 September 2008 at 3:59am
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Hayfa Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 25 September 2008 at 7:20pm
Asalam Alaikum,
 
Welcome to the Forum, there are far better people to advise you than myself for sure..
 
A few thoughts:
 
She is right you need to becomea Muslim for YOU and you alone. That can be hard to seperate truly.. but its like, if you never see her again, what would you do.. imagine taking her out of the equation.  
 
I think it helps if you have specific questions.. etc. The major basic difference, I believe is that Muslims do not believe Jesus (PBUH) is God or the son of God, but one of the major Prophets.  Long before I discovered Islam I had left Christianity cause of the dogma. Each person feels better about certain things.
 
for instance, it is comforting for some to feel that if they "beleive" in Jesus they will be saved. Whereas for Muslims the road is given, ultimately there are no gaurantees. Far more scary I think.  It is more about living on the "edge." Each moment counts, how i live, my thoughts, my actions etc.
 
As far as helping her.. new Muslims can help "born" and vice versa.  Not all born Muslims have a very good education. Some don't even know how to do prayers right.  Plus as you seek knowledge through lectures etc.. you can share that information.
 
Obviously you beleive in God/Allah. And that is the first and most important aspect. It would be acknowledging Prophet Mohammed and that Allah hsa produced no son or was produced.
 
ther are other finer points.. but do ask questions... most people here are pretty nice and respect that you are seeking honest information. And there is no complusion in religion.
 
Welcome again
 
Hayfa 
When you do things from your soul, you feel a river moving in you, a joy. Rumi
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote bb43v3r Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 26 September 2008 at 5:05am
Thank you for replying my topic.
 
Now in my present state, i am not thinking about convertion for her.
 
I am basicaly trying to understand Islam so that i can choose my path between Christianity and Islam. For your info, i have not been in good faith with my current religion bcoz.... I cant explain, its like something is missing from the teachings. So i had stopped doing my prayers and going to Church for more than 10years already, thinking which is which and what is correct and not.
 
Recently in these 2 years, I have learnt quite a few things about Islam and found that some answers from the Koran is logical than to the Bible.
 
So i need more advise on the teachings of Islam.
 
 
 
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote believer Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 26 September 2008 at 7:24am
Have you read the Quran?  It is a bit vague on a few things that are historically true.
 
To become Muslim you have to give up the fact that GOD has given you the grace of salvation through the crucifixtion of Jesus. 
 
Even though it says:
 
003.054
YUSUFALI: And (the unbelievers) plotted and planned, and Allah too planned, and the best of planners is Allah.
PICKTHAL: And they (the disbelievers) schemed, and Allah schemed (against them): and Allah is the best of schemers.
SHAKIR: And they planned and Allah (also) planned, and Allah is the best of planners.

003.055
YUSUFALI: Behold! Allah said: "O Jesus! I will take thee and raise thee to Myself and clear thee (of the falsehoods) of those who blaspheme; I will make those who follow thee superior to those who reject faith, to the Day of Resurrection: Then shall ye all return unto me, and I will judge between you of the matters wherein ye dispute.
PICKTHAL: (And remember) when Allah said: O Jesus! Lo! I am gathering thee and causing thee to ascend unto Me, and am cleansing thee of those who disbelieve and am setting those who follow thee above those who disbelieve until the Day of Resurrection. Then unto Me ye will (all) return, and I shall judge between you as to that wherein ye used to differ.
SHAKIR: And when Allah said: O Isa, I am going to terminate the period of your stay (on earth) and cause you to ascend unto Me and purify you of those who disbelieve and make those who follow you above those who disbelieve to the day of resurrection; then to Me shall be your return, so l will decide between you concerning that in which you differed.

Muslims do not understand that Jesus died physically and was resurected and that His soul did not die but went to the spirits in prison,  separated from GOD which for the Christian is death.
 
The Jews are accussed of:
004.155
YUSUFALI: (They have incurred divine displeasure): In that they broke their covenant; that they rejected the signs of Allah; that they slew the Messengers in defiance of right; that they said, "Our hearts are the wrappings (which preserve Allah's Word; We need no more)";- Nay, Allah hath set the seal on their hearts for their blasphemy, and little is it they believe;-
PICKTHAL: Then because of their breaking of their covenant, and their disbelieving in the revelations of Allah, and their slaying of the prophets wrongfully, and their saying: Our hearts are hardened - Nay, but Allah set a seal upon them for their disbelief, so that they believe not save a few -
SHAKIR: Therefore, for their breaking their covenant and their disbelief in the communications of Allah and their killing the prophets wrongfully and their saying: Our hearts are covered; nay! Allah set a seal upon them owing to their unbelief, so they shall not believe except a few.
 
Jesus is the Word of GOD made flesh.  Yet Muslims do not believe this even though it says so in the Quran:
004.171
YUSUFALI: O People of the Book! Commit no excesses in your religion: Nor say of Allah aught but the truth. Christ Jesus the son of Mary was a messenger of Allah, and His Word, which He bestowed on Mary, and a spirit proceeding from Him: so believe in Allah and His messengers. Say not "Trinity" : desist: it will be better for you: for Allah is one Allah: Glory be to Him: above having a son. To Him belong all things in the heavens and on earth. And enough is Allah as a Disposer of affairs.
PICKTHAL: O People of the Scripture! Do not exaggerate in your religion nor utter aught concerning Allah save the truth. The Messiah, Jesus son of Mary, was only a messenger of Allah, and His word which He conveyed unto Mary, and a spirit from Him. So believe in Allah and His messengers, and say not "Three" - Cease! (it is) better for you! - Allah is only One Allah. Far is it removed from His Transcendent Majesty that He should have a son. His is all that is in the heavens and all that is in the earth. And Allah is sufficient as Defender.
SHAKIR: O followers of the Book! do not exceed the limits in your religion, and do not speak (lies) against Allah, but (speak) the truth; the Messiah, Isa son of Marium is only a messenger of Allah and His Word which He communicated to Marium and a spirit from Him; believe therefore in Allah and His messengers, and say not, Three. Desist, it is better for you; Allah is only one Allah; far be It from His glory that He should have a son, whatever is in the heavens and whatever is in the earth is His, and Allah is sufficient for a Protector.
 
The Quran does deny that Jesus is the only begotten Son of GOD, but there is a uniqueness given to Jesus above all humans even Mohammd yet it is Mohammad that Muslims follow and not Jesus.
 
The Quran even says you will be judged by the Gospel!!  So there is no need to revert except to marry!!
 
John 3
16"For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote bb43v3r Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 26 September 2008 at 7:33pm
I am not denying the teachings of Christians or Islam but what confuse me are about almost the same teachings but still very far apart.
 
 
1. Trinity = 3 = meaning GOD, Jesus (But as you have said it, GODS word in flesh form, i would agree on this but not the only Son Of God, I thought all humans are sons of GOD since he is the ONE that brought us here in the first place, so he should be the FATHER) and Holy Spirit, i thought GOD is GOD alone
 
2. Jesus = Crucified & Resurrected but in Islam he died of aged at 120years old (Correct me if wrong, thx) The most contradicted matter in history of religion by far since nobody still can confirm this matter
 
3. Fasting = why we dont fast like Islam? Since it is written that Jesus did fast for 40days and nights and we were told to fast in the bible
 
4. Pilgrimage = It is stated we should do pilgrimage but i havent seen any only that Islam does it.
 
5. Zakat (I cant remember in english) = Stated in bible somewhere that we pay zakat but i dont see we doing it either, unless is considered as those donations you give every Mass.
 
6. Islam prays every Friday, we every Sunday, and they also do pray 5 times a day, why we pray in different times? Why Friday and not Sunday and why Sunday and not Friday?
 
7. Why Christians goes to church, we wear what we like in a house of GOD which i think is not the correct way whereby Islam they are ONE?
 
8. If the Quran has the Gospel as the bible did, why are we so different until now?
 
9. As my knowledge is not there yet, i would guess Christians and Islam are praying to the same GOD/ALLAH but we are doing it in a different manner and different believes. Correct me if i am wrong, since everything stated in the bible and Quran are almost similiar writings and teachings, only problem is about Jesus and Muhammad.
 
10. Why Islam can marry 4 and why did GOD gave his commands to let this happen? And why does prophet Muhammad was able to marry a 9yr old girl, in any society thats not good? (Hope this is correct unless people just speculate for the sake of tarnishing Islam, if so, than very sorry for these). Christians able to marry once?
 
11. I did notice someone said in the Quran, Allah teaches to kill all non believers, i thought that once Judgement day comes, Allah will just judge and we as humans are not to be the judge. I am not sure is there anything related in the bible to let us kill as if GOD gave his approval to let do whatever we like
 
12. Islam has a law that makes woman lower than man, not lower but worst. Lets say rape, needs 4 male witnesses, if during rape and those 4 males know the rapist, i am sure they will keep their mouths shut and enjoy their time too.
 
13. Are the any ten commanments in Quran like in the Bible?
 
This is why i am confused, I know that both religions are supposed to be peaceful and GOD is SUPPOSED TO BE ALL LOVING, but what boggles me is that why Islam has some teachings inhuman?
 


Edited by bb43v3r - 26 September 2008 at 7:35pm
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote minuteman Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 26 September 2008 at 7:56pm
Originally posted by believer believer wrote:

Have you read the Quran?  It is a bit vague on a few things that are historically true.
 
To become Muslim you have to give up the fact that GOD has given you the grace of salvation through the crucifixtion of Jesus. 
 
  Believer, you re trying in vain to divert a simple soul away from God. What you have presented below is the perfect truth in terms of history and spiritual matters. I will comment (in blue).
 
Quote
Even though it says:
 
003.054
YUSUFALI: And (the unbelievers) plotted and planned, and Allah too planned, and the best of planners is Allah.
PICKTHAL: And they (the disbelievers) schemed, and Allah schemed (against them): and Allah is the best of schemers.
SHAKIR: And they planned and Allah (also) planned, and Allah is the best of planners.
 
 That is perfectly true. The Jews of that time plotted against the man of God Jesus, that is to kill him on the cross. God (Allh) also planned to save Jesus from that death on the cross. And Allah is the best planner.
Quote

003.055
YUSUFALI: Behold! Allah said: "O Jesus! I will take thee and raise thee to Myself and clear thee (of the falsehoods) of those who blaspheme; I will make those who follow thee superior to those who reject faith, to the Day of Resurrection: Then shall ye all return unto me, and I will judge between you of the matters wherein ye dispute.
PICKTHAL: (And remember) when Allah said: O Jesus! Lo! I am gathering thee and causing thee to ascend unto Me, and am cleansing thee of those who disbelieve and am setting those who follow thee above those who disbelieve until the Day of Resurrection. Then unto Me ye will (all) return, and I shall judge between you as to that wherein ye used to differ.
SHAKIR: And when Allah said: O Isa, I am going to terminate the period of your stay (on earth) and cause you to ascend unto Me and purify you of those who disbelieve and make those who follow you above those who disbelieve to the day of resurrection; then to Me shall be your return, so l will decide between you concerning that in which you differed. 

That is correct. Allah promised four things to Jesus. The number one was that he will not die on the cross but he will die a natural death (Mutawaffeka).
 
 The number two was that his soul will be raised in ranks toward Allah.
The number three was that Allah will wash away all blames against Jesus.
The number four was that the believers in Jesus will prevail (will rule) over those who do not believe in Jesus.
 
 Remember that the first promise is about natural death. The whole verse is in praise of Jesus a.s.
]quote]
 
 Muslims do not understand that Jesus died physically and was resurected and that His soul did not die but went to the spirits in prison,  separated from GOD which for the Christian is death.[/quote]
 
  Muslims understand everything that happened to Jesus. He did not die. He was not a god. God does not die. The christians should think about it "How can a God die?" And then they want him to get up from the dead. He was not dead. The Jews wanted to kill him. And the christians want to help the Jews that they indeed killed him. Muslims do not believe that.
Quote
 
The Jews are accussed of:
004.155
YUSUFALI: (They have incurred divine displeasure): In that they broke their covenant; that they rejected the signs of Allah; that they slew the Messengers in defiance of right; that they said, "Our hearts are the wrappings (which preserve Allah's Word; We need no more)";- Nay, Allah hath set the seal on their hearts for their blasphemy, and little is it they believe;-
PICKTHAL: Then because of their breaking of their covenant, and their disbelieving in the revelations of Allah, and their slaying of the prophets wrongfully, and their saying: Our hearts are hardened - Nay, but Allah set a seal upon them for their disbelief, so that they believe not save a few -
SHAKIR: Therefore, for their breaking their covenant and their disbelief in the communications of Allah and their killing the prophets wrongfully and their saying: Our hearts are covered; nay! Allah set a seal upon them owing to their unbelief, so they shall not believe except a few. 
 
 It is a perfectly true report of the Quran that the Jews killed and tried to kill many of their prophets, including Jesus. Perhaps, believer wants to deny that. No one can deny that. Proof is all there in the bible OT and NT.
Quote
 
Jesus is the Word of GOD made flesh.  Yet Muslims do not believe this even though it says so in the Quran:
004.171
YUSUFALI: O People of the Book! Commit no excesses in your religion: Nor say of Allah aught but the truth. Christ Jesus the son of Mary was a messenger of Allah, and His Word, which He bestowed on Mary, and a spirit proceeding from Him: so believe in Allah and His messengers. Say not "Trinity" : desist: it will be better for you: for Allah is one Allah: Glory be to Him: above having a son. To Him belong all things in the heavens and on earth. And enough is Allah as a Disposer of affairs.
PICKTHAL: O People of the Scripture! Do not exaggerate in your religion nor utter aught concerning Allah save the truth. The Messiah, Jesus son of Mary, was only a messenger of Allah, and His word which He conveyed unto Mary, and a spirit from Him. So believe in Allah and His messengers, and say not "Three" - Cease! (it is) better for you! - Allah is only One Allah. Far is it removed from His Transcendent Majesty that He should have a son. His is all that is in the heavens and all that is in the earth. And Allah is sufficient as Defender.
SHAKIR: O followers of the Book! do not exceed the limits in your religion, and do not speak (lies) against Allah, but (speak) the truth; the Messiah, Isa son of Marium is only a messenger of Allah and His Word which He communicated to Marium and a spirit from Him; believe therefore in Allah and His messengers, and say not, Three. Desist, it is better for you; Allah is only one Allah; far be It from His glory that He should have a son, whatever is in the heavens and whatever is in the earth is His, and Allah is sufficient for a Protector. 
 
  There is no need to comment on all that. It is all true what is in the Quran. It is so beautiful, all about Jesus and his mother. As believers in Islam, we do not miss any one. We have Abraham, Issac, Moses and Jesus, Maryam  and muhammad, all with us without any prejudice to any one. Pure love equal for all of them.
Quote
 
The Quran does deny that Jesus is the only begotten Son of GOD, but there is a uniqueness given to Jesus above all humans even Mohammd yet it is Mohammad that Muslims follow and not Jesus.
 
The Quran even says you will be judged by the Gospel!!  So there is no need to revert except to marry!!
 
 
  Yes, Quran says that God has no family and no son. That is true. Otherwise that son being a god, will breed more children and more gods. Every one, please rest assured that there is nothing wrong in Quran.One has to read the Book (Quran).
 


Edited by minuteman - 26 September 2008 at 8:01pm
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote _ALI_ Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 27 September 2008 at 5:22am
Salam bb43v3r
I'm glad that you are considering Islam. Just ask anything which confuses you in these forums. I'll try to reply to some of your comments 
2. Jesus = Crucified & Resurrected but in Islam he died of aged at 120years old (Correct me if wrong, thx) The most contradicted matter in history of religion by far since nobody still can confirm this matter
Not exactly. According to Muslims, Jesus did not die at the age of 120. He is still alive and will come back. Also he was not crucified, he was raised up alive by God.

004.157 وَقَوْلِهِمْ إِنَّا قَتَلْنَا الْمَسِيحَ عِيسَى ابْنَ مَرْيَمَ رَسُولَ اللَّهِ وَمَا قَتَلُوهُ وَمَا صَلَبُوهُ وَلَكِنْ شُبِّهَ لَهُمْ وَإِنَّ الَّذِينَ اخْتَلَفُوا فِيهِ لَفِي شَكٍّ مِنْهُ مَا لَهُمْ بِهِ مِنْ عِلْمٍ إِلا اتِّبَاعَ الظَّنِّ وَمَا قَتَلُوهُ يَقِينًا
004.157 That they said (in boast), "We killed Christ Jesus the son of Mary, the Messenger of Allah";- but they killed him not, nor crucified him, but so it was made to appear to them, and those who differ therein are full of doubts, with no (certain) knowledge, but only conjecture to follow, for of a surety they killed him not:-
Al-Qur'an, 004.157 (An-Nisa [Women])
Text Copied from DivineIslam's Qur'an Viewer software v2.910
6. Islam prays every Friday, we every Sunday, and they also do pray 5 times a day, why we pray in different times? Why Friday and not Sunday and why Sunday and not Friday?
We Muslims pray 5 times everyday but we have a special prayer on friday inwhich the Imam (who leads the prayers) gives a religious lecture. Why friday? Because our prophet Muhammad pbuh told us to do so. And as for Christians praying on Sunday, I have never read anywhere in the Bible that Jesus Christ prayed on Sunday. Instead Jesus was a Jew and kept the Sabbath on Saturaday. But Constantine, who made Christianity an official religion of the state, he was an ex-sun god worshipper. Sun god was worshipped on sunday so I suppose he chose sunday for Christianity.
 8. If the Quran has the Gospel as the bible did, why are we so different until now?
I don't understand what you mean by "having the gospel" but our view regarding the gospel is that Jesus was given Injeel (translated gospel) like prophet Muhammad was given Quran. He preached that book as mentioned in the Bible
And it came to pass, that on one of those days, as he taught the people in the temple, and preached the gospel, the chief priests and the scribes came upon him with the elders (Luke 2:1)
However, the gospel revealed to Jesus is no longer here. We only have the Bible which we Muslims believe is not authentic. It contains word of God, prophets, historians and a few obscene verses which you cannot read in front of your mother/sister(I'm really sorry but I cannot think of a more sophisticated word than obscene. I don't want to hurt anyone's feelings)
 9. As my knowledge is not there yet, i would guess Christians and Islam are praying to the same GOD/ALLAH but we are doing it in a different manner and different believes.
I agree that we pray to the same Allah. The arabic Bible refers to God as Allah. But the problem is that Christians say that Allah is three in one or one in three. Jesus is the son of Allah or Jesus is the incarnation of Allah. We Muslims disagree with that completely.
019.088 وَقَالُوا اتَّخَذَ الرَّحْمَنُ وَلَدًا
019.088 They say: "(Allah) Most Gracious has begotten a son!"
019.089 لَقَدْ جِئْتُمْ شَيْئًا إِدًّا
019.089 Indeed ye have put forth a thing most monstrous!
019.090 تَكَادُ السَّمَاوَاتُ يَتَفَطَّرْنَ مِنْهُ وَتَنْشَقُّ الأرْضُ وَتَخِرُّ الْجِبَالُ هَدًّا
019.090 At it the skies are ready to burst, the earth to split asunder, and the mountains to fall down in utter ruin,
Al-Qur'an, 019.088-090 (Maryam [Mary])
Text Copied from DivineIslam's Qur'an Viewer software v2.910
Correct me if i am wrong, since everything stated in the bible and Quran are almost similiar writings and teachings, only problem is about Jesus and Muhammad.
Well I see 2 really big problems. 1) Correct me if I am wrong but Christians also believe that mankind is born in sin because of something our great father Adam did. Islam completely disagrees with that notion and says that all mankind is born sinless. Christians say Jesus Christ was crucified for our sins but Muslims say that we all bear the individual burden of our own sins. We don't need Jesus for our sins. If we sincerely repent, God forgives us 
004.099 فَأُولَئِكَ عَسَى اللَّهُ أَنْ يَعْفُوَ عَنْهُمْ وَكَانَ اللَّهُ عَفُوًّا غَفُورًا
004.099 For these, there is hope that Allah will forgive: For Allah doth blot out (sins) and forgive again and again.
Al-Qur'an, 004.099 (An-Nisa [Women])
Text Copied from DivineIslam's Qur'an Viewer software v2.910
 
10. Why Islam can marry 4 and why did GOD gave his commands to let this happen?
The answer to this question has been given in detail by Dr. Zakir Naik. I'll just quote him

Most Common Questions asked by Non-Muslims

POLYGAMY

Question:

Why is a man allowed to have more than one wife in Islam? i.e. why is polygamy allowed in Islam?

Answer:

Definition of Polygamy

1.  Polygamy means a system of marriage whereby one person has more than one spouse. Polygamy can be of two types. One is polygyny where a man marries more than one woman, and the other is polyandry, where a woman marries more than one man. In Islam, limited polygyny is permitted; whereas polyandry is completely prohibited.

Now coming to the original question, why is a man allowed to have more than one wife?


2.  
The Qur�an is the only religious scripture in the world that says,"marry only one".

The Qur�an is the only religious book, on the face of this earth, that contains the phrase �marry only one�. There is no other religious book that instructs men to have only one wife. In none of the other religious scriptures, whether it be the Vedas, the Ramayan, the Mahabharat, the Geeta, the Talmud or the Bible does one find a restriction on the number of wives. According to these scriptures one can marry as many as one wishes. It was only later, that the Hindu priests and the Christian Church restricted the number of wives to one.

Many Hindu religious personalities, according to their scriptures, had multiple wives. King Dashrat, the father of Rama, had more than one wife. Krishna had several wives.

In earlier times, Christian men were permitted as many wives as they wished, since the Bible puts no restriction on the number of wives. It was only a few centuries ago that the Church restricted the number of wives to one.

Polygyny is permitted in Judaism. According to Talmudic law, Abraham had three wives, and Solomon had hundreds of wives. The practice of polygyny continued till Rabbi Gershom ben Yehudah (95% C.E to 1030 C.E) issued an edict against it. The Jewish Sephardic communities living in Muslim countries continued the practice till as late as 1950, until an Act of the Chief Rabbinate of Israel extended the ban on marrying more than one wife.


3.  
Hindus are more polygynous than Muslims

The report of the �Committee of The Status of Woman in Islam�, published in 1975 mentions on page numbers 66 and 67 that the percentage of polygamous marriages between the years 1951 and 1961 was 5.06% among the Hindus and only 4.31% among the Muslims. According to Indian law only Muslim men are permitted to have more than one wife. It is illegal for any non-Muslim in India to have more than one wife. Despite it being illegal, Hindus have more multiple wives as compared to Muslims. Earlier, there was no restriction even on Hindu men with respect to the number of wives allowed. It was only in 1954, when the Hindu Marriage Act was passed that it became illegal for a Hindu to have more than one wife. At present it is the Indian Law that restricts a Hindu man from having more than one wife and not the Hindu scriptures.

Let us now analyse why Islam allows a man to have more than one wife.


4.   Qur�an permits limited polygyny

As I mentioned earlier, Qur�an is the only religious book on the face of the earth that says �marry only one�. The context of this phrase is the following verse from Surah Nisa of the Glorious Qur�an:

"Marry women of your choice, two, or three, or four; but if ye fear that ye shall not be able to deal justly (with them), then only one."

                                  [Al-Qur�an 4:3]

Before the Qur�an was revealed, there was no upper limit for polygyny and many men had scores of wives, some even hundreds. Islam put an upper limit of four wives. Islam gives a man permission to marry two, three or four women, only on the condition that he deals justly with them.

In the same chapter i.e. Surah Nisa verse 129 says:

"Ye are never able to be fair and just as between women...."

                                 [Al-Qur�an 4:129]

Therefore polygyny is not a rule but an exception. Many people are under the misconception that it is compulsory for a Muslim man to have more than one wife.

Broadly, Islam has five categories of Do�s and Don�ts:

  1. Fard� i.e. compulsory or obligatory

  2. Mustahab� i.e. recommended or encouraged

  3. Mubah� i.e. permissible or allowed

  4. Makruh� i.e. not recommended or discouraged

  5. Haraam� i.e. prohibited or forbidden

Polygyny falls in the middle category of things that are permissible. It cannot be said that a Muslim who has two, three or four wives is a better Muslim as compared to a Muslim who has only one wife.


5.  
Average life span of females is more than that of males

By nature males and females are born in approximately the same ratio. A female child has more immunity than a male child. A female child can fight the germs and diseases better than the male child. For this reason, during the pediatric age itself there are more deaths among males as compared to the females.

During wars, there are more men killed as compared to women. More men die due to accidents and diseases than women. The average life span of females is more than that of males, and at any given time one finds more widows in the world than widowers.


6.  
India has more male population than female due to female foeticide and infanticide

India is one of the few countries, along with the other neighbouring countries, in which the female population is less than the male population. The reason lies in the high rate of female infanticide in India, and the fact that more than one million female foetuses are aborted every year in this country, after they are identified as females. If this evil practice is stopped, then India too will have more females as compared to males.


7.  
World female population is more than male population

In the USA, women outnumber men by 7.8 million. New York alone has one million more females as compared to the number of males, and of the male population of New York one-third are gays i.e sodomites. The U.S.A as a whole has more than twenty-five million gays. This means that these people do not wish to marry women. Great Britain has four million more females as compared to males. Germany has five million more females as compared to males. Russia has nine million more females than males. God alone knows how many million more females there are in the whole world as compared to males.


8.  
Restricting each and every man to have only one wife is not practical

Even if every man got married to one woman, there would still be more than thirty million females in U.S.A who would not be able to get husbands (considering that America has twenty five million gays). There would be more than four million females in Great Britain, 5 million females in Germany and nine million females in Russia alone who would not be able to find a husband.

Suppose my sister happens to be one of the unmarried women living in USA, or suppose your sister happens to be one of the unmarried women in USA. The only two options remaining for her are that she either marries a man who already has a wife or becomes public property. There is no other option. All those who are modest will opt for the first.

In Western society, it is common for a man to have mistresses and/or multiple extra-marital affairs, in which case, the woman leads a disgraceful, unprotected life. The same society, however, cannot accept a man having more than one wife, in which women retain their honourable, dignified position in society and lead a protected life.

Thus the only two options before a woman who cannot find a husband is to marry a married man or to become public property. Islam prefers giving women the honourable position by permitting the first option and disallowing the second.

There are several other reasons, why Islam has permitted limited polygyny, but it is mainly to protect the modesty of women

SOURCEhttp://www.irf.net/irf/faqonislam/index.htm
And why does prophet Muhammad was able to marry a 9yr old girl, in any society thats not good? (Hope this is correct unless people just speculate for the sake of tarnishing Islam, if so, than very sorry for these
 It is ironic that many people magnify the fact that prophet Muhammad pbuh married Aisha to repel people from Islam. It is important to know that girls during the Biblical and Islamic days used to be married off at young ages when they either had their first periods. In other words, when they turn into "women", then they get married off. It was quite different for men on the other hand, because physical power and the ability of living an independent life had always been and will always be a mandatory requirement for men to have in life. So men waited much longer than women in terms of getting married. The guy had to develop both his body and mind before he was ready for marriage.
That is why you see girls as young as 9 or 10 were married to men as old as 30 or even older. The culture back then and in many third world countries today (NON-MUSLIM ONES TOO) is quite different than what you live in today.
Fathers can sell their daughters as slave girls to other men in the Bible:

Exodus 21:7-11
7. "If a man sells his daughter as a female slave, she is not to go free as the male slaves do."
So it would be hypocritical of any person to say that Prophet Muhammad pbuh did something totally unethical and neglect what the Bible says. But the question remains, is it something totally unethical? To tell you the truth, no one, not even Aisha objected to this marriage. According to an authentic Hadith
Narrated Aisha: "The Prophet engaged me when I was a girl of six (years). We went to Medina and stayed at the home of Bani-al-Harith bin Khazraj. Then I got ill and my hair fell down. Later on my hair grew (again) and my mother, Um Ruman, came to me while I was playing in a swing with some of my girl friends. She called me, and I went to her, not knowing what she wanted to do to me. She caught me by the hand and made me stand at the door of the house. I was breathless then, and when my breathing became Alright, she took some water and rubbed my face and head with it. Then she took me into the house. There in the house I saw some Ansari women who said, "Best wishes and Allah's Blessing and a good luck." Then she entrusted me to them and they prepared me (for the marriage). Unexpectedly Allah's Apostle came to me in the forenoon and my mother handed me over to him, and at that time I was a girl of nine years of age. (Translation of Sahih Bukhari, Merits of the Helpers in Madinah (Ansaar), Volume 5, Book 58, Number 234)"

Notice here that Aisha's mother and the Muslim women back then were ok with her marriage. It was part of the Arab custom and still is in many of the Muslim and non-Muslim countries today for girls to marry at a very young age. When a girl's body starts showing up then she would be ready for marriage. Parents look at the girl's physical appearance when they prepare her for marriage. They don't care about her age. She could be 9 or 13, it doesn't matter.
we have to look at the life of Lady Aisha afterwards. She was without doubt one of the foremost scholars of Islam. It is even said that she had attained in her lifetime the position of Mufti - someone capable of giving religious rulings - a position very few Muslims will ever occupy.

She was seeked by many, both men and women, who hungered for knowledge and they came to her from all directions, Yemen, Bahrain, Syria. History does not know of any woman who was approached by so many for such a noble purpose.
And the fact that she had spoken so dearly of the Prophet was indicative of the innocence of the marriage and of the impeccable character of her husband because given the trust enjoyed by her by the virtue of her relationship with him, she could have unleashed a vengeful attack against him by attributing to him words or deeds of horrendous nature if indeed she was a victim of his supposed lust, destroying both the Prophet and Islam.
You also need to know that life 1400 years ago was very rough in the too hot desert. From my personal knowledge, the average life span back then was 50 years. People used to die from all kinds of diseases. Both parents of Prophet Muhammad peace be upon him for instance, died natural deaths before he even knew them. His father, Abdallah bin Hashem, died while Amina bint Wahb, Muhammad's mother was still pregnant with Muhammad. After she gave birth, she died when he was 2 years old (I believe).
So simply put, most of the girls were being married off at the same age. Of course, girls were married at a later age but they were mostly widows.
 Furthermore, she, along with all the other wives of the prophet was once given an option of divorce. She was told to cosult her parents but she did not even do that and chose prophet Muhammad. Narrated by Aisha
"Allah's messenger pbuh gave us the option (to get divorce) but we did not deem it as divorce"(Muslim H#2698)
11. I did notice someone said in the Quran, Allah teaches to kill all non believers, i thought that once Judgement day comes, Allah will just judge and we as humans are not to be the judge. I am not sure is there anything related in the bible to let us kill as if GOD gave his approval to let do whatever we like
 I would advise you not to learn Islam from non-Muslim sources. You are refering to the most frequently misquoted verse of the Quran in Chap 9 verse 5: fight and slay the Pagans wherever ye find them,
But it is out of context. In the context, you read that the Muslims and the pagans of Makkah had a peace treaty which was unilaterally broken by the pagans of Makkah. In this verse Allah has declared war against those pagans and tells the Muslims to kill them in the battle field. Furthermore if you read the next verse
009.006 وَإِنْ أَحَدٌ مِنَ الْمُشْرِكِينَ اسْتَجَارَكَ فَأَجِرْهُ حَتَّى يَسْمَعَ كَلامَ اللَّهِ ثُمَّ أَبْلِغْهُ مَأْمَنَهُ ذَلِكَ بِأَنَّهُمْ قَوْمٌ لا يَعْلَمُونَ
009.006 If one amongst the Pagans ask thee for asylum, grant it to him, so that he may hear the word of Allah; and then escort him to where he can be secure. That is because they are men without knowledge.
Al-Qur'an, 009.005-006 (At-Tawba [Repentance, Dispensation])
Text Copied from DivineIslam's Qur'an Viewer software v2.910
So we are told to give peace to those who want peace.
12. Islam has a law that makes woman lower than man, not lower but worst. Lets say rape, needs 4 male witnesses, if during rape and those 4 males know the rapist, i am sure they will keep their mouths shut and enjoy their time too.
 I don't want this post to be long so I will just quote this link here which replies to your comment
13. Are the any ten commanments in Quran like in the Bible?
Here is another link
This is why i am confused, I know that both religions are supposed to be peaceful and GOD is SUPPOSED TO BE ALL LOVING, but what boggles me is that why Islam has some teachings inhuman?
As I have explained to you, Islam is not inhuman. My advise to you would be to learn Islam from Muslim sources instead of non-Muslim sources. And feel free to ask any question regarding Islam.
Peace
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote bb43v3r Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 27 September 2008 at 10:31pm

Wow, thank you Ali for your informations about the Quran and Islam.

004.099 For these, there is hope that Allah will forgive: For Allah doth blot out (sins) and forgive again and again.

Ok, i dont understand this part, i feel this this part is being misused somehow by certain people. Please dont get angry at what i am about to ask bcoz its not relating to every Muslems, is this how some Islam fanatics/extremist (Those fighting a war at the moment and supporting it)  thinks, they will be forgiven if they suicide bomb, killing innocent peoples (I actually dont care about the soldiers since they only follow orders) and calling it a Jihad?
 
 
 
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