Please advise me...

Asslamu'alikum,
My mother passed away a month ago, I was with her in Pakitan when she died, I am originally from the UK. I hadn't been to Pakistan for 22 yrs.  I met most of my relatives for the first time.

My mum died very suddenly of a heart attack she was absolutely fine the night before and in the morning she died. when she died my mums side of the family accused me and my father of killing her, i gave them the benefit if the doubt and carried on talking to them. My mum gave them some money to look after which they denied having, and when I told them I knew they had the money they handed it over. when me and my brosthers and sisters and father came back to england, we heard they were still claimimg we had killed her.

Allah talla is my witness and knows what happened that day and He knows that nothing untoward happened and we did not kill her. It was Allahs' will that she was taken, and a test to us if we children return to the right path and mashallah my sister and i are praying 5 times for the first time in our lives and rememeber Allah in everything that we do.

But I have read we are not allowed to break ties with our relatives.  I find it really hard to talk to my relatives after they accused me of this horrible thing, it makes me want to cry just thinking of it. I couldn't ever do anything to hurt my mum never mind kill my mum I love her soo much and it hurts so much that I will never hear her voice whilst I am alive, inshallah I will continue rememebring allah and praying for the rest of my life, but what scares me is that I may not be allowed in heaven if I break ties with these realtives.

I am really finding it hard to talk to them, as within conversation the say bad things about my dad or make digs at me. My father is the only person I have now, my mother will never see my kids and I am not going to deny them their grandfather, but they want us to break ties with our dad.

What do I do, I am trying to be patient with my mothers death and not break down at every thing that reminds me of her and when I do remember her I pray for her. Please help me as my mums sister who was one of the people who accused me of this horrible thing phoned today and I couldn't talk to her so I hung up, but just now I have read i will never see heaven if i break ties with relatives, please tell me what to do. 
I am sorry to have rambled but I am so worried about this.
Wassalam

Salaam  Jenni,

thanks for responding so quick, that is what I thought but I was still worried of commiting  a sin, I'll just keep praying that they stop saying nasty things about me and my dad.

Thanks again, take care

Bismillah,

Dear Sister Zenib,

Ma'ShahAllah that you are praying five times a day.  That's wonderful, hun, keep it up!

I agree with Jenni and ak.  It's your job to protect your children.  They have a right not to be exposed to vicious lies.  If those people really believed that, they should have charged you.  Since obviously they didn't report you to the authorities, they had no evidence and need to keep quiet.

With time they may see that you are not going to buckle in to their pressure.  Because they sound exactly like the kind of people who would accuse you on the one hand and then say you'll go to hell for not talking to them.

You need to grieve your dear mum.  Do they have grievance counseling in the UK?  Do you think it would help you?  Why don't you focus on getting healthy by dealing with her death and how it has impacted your life and try really hard to ignore callous people at least until you are healed.

Assalamu alaikum,

My dear Sister Abeer, your incredibly strong deen never ceases to amaze me!  You always remember to remind us of the example of our Prophet (pbuh), an example we should all strive to live up to.

Sister Zenib, surely your family has caused you much hurt.  If you look in your heart, you will find a way to keep the ties of kinship without compromising your safety or peace of mind.  May Allah give you much strength and courage to live your life in the way that is most pleasing to Him.  And may the remembrance of Allah help to ease your grief at the loss of your dear mother.

Peace, ummziba.