Difficult marriage

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   Asalam Walaikum. I need some helpful advice and suggestions please. JazzakAllah Khair in advance. I am 25 and I have been married for almost 4 years now and have one baby, Alhumdulilah. My marriage has been bad from the beginning because we argue a lot. My husband is very religious and when he got married to me, he knew that I wasn't as practicing like him. I pray and fast and just do the basic. He is very controlling and tries to use Islam to his benefit. He tells me that if I don't listen to him, Allah will punish me but he is very unreasonable and it's hard to follow everything he asks for. He also hit me when I was pregnant and whenever we argue he would push me. He starts getting really angry and frustrated over small things and starts getting loud. He even showed signs of negligence towards our baby. He wouldn't feed unless the baby cries. I want to get a divorce but I know that we might get shared custody which I don't want because he won't take care of our baby properly when it's his time to take the baby. We spent so much money on marriage counseling but nothing is working. Since it's Ramadan, I thought I will see how things go this month and make sincere dua to Allah but unfortunately he is a very difficult person to deal with. He is also very sneaky and so front of people he is really nice but when we are alone, he is mean and really harsh with some of his words. I feel so depressed and feel like I'm stranded in the middle of nowhere. I visited few lawyers but all of them are saying that we might share custody and I just can't show anyone that he isn't capable of taking care of our baby. When I tell him to 'take care' of the baby he just turns on the tv and puts the baby front of the tv while he is using his phone or the computer. If anyone here has any legal experience or any knowledge of what I can do, please please help me. I'm so desperately  in need of help. I don't work so I have no money to pay for expensive lawyers either. I don't know where to go or who to turn to. Please keep me and my baby in your duas, we are so helpless. JazzakAllah Khair 

Edited by Muslimah7 - 04 June 2017 at 10:52pm

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Muslimah7 Members Profile Send Private Message Find Members Posts Add to Buddy List Starter. Joined: 04 June 2017 Status: Offline Points: 1	Post Options Post Reply Quote Muslimah7 Report Post Thanks(0) Quote Reply Topic: Difficult marriage Posted: 04 June 2017 at 10:49pm
	Asalam Walaikum. I need some helpful advice and suggestions please. JazzakAllah Khair in advance. I am 25 and I have been married for almost 4 years now and have one baby, Alhumdulilah. My marriage has been bad from the beginning because we argue a lot. My husband is very religious and when he got married to me, he knew that I wasn't as practicing like him. I pray and fast and just do the basic. He is very controlling and tries to use Islam to his benefit. He tells me that if I don't listen to him, Allah will punish me but he is very unreasonable and it's hard to follow everything he asks for. He also hit me when I was pregnant and whenever we argue he would push me. He starts getting really angry and frustrated over small things and starts getting loud. He even showed signs of negligence towards our baby. He wouldn't feed unless the baby cries. I want to get a divorce but I know that we might get shared custody which I don't want because he won't take care of our baby properly when it's his time to take the baby. We spent so much money on marriage counseling but nothing is working. Since it's Ramadan, I thought I will see how things go this month and make sincere dua to Allah but unfortunately he is a very difficult person to deal with. He is also very sneaky and so front of people he is really nice but when we are alone, he is mean and really harsh with some of his words. I feel so depressed and feel like I'm stranded in the middle of nowhere. I visited few lawyers but all of them are saying that we might share custody and I just can't show anyone that he isn't capable of taking care of our baby. When I tell him to 'take care' of the baby he just turns on the tv and puts the baby front of the tv while he is using his phone or the computer. If anyone here has any legal experience or any knowledge of what I can do, please please help me. I'm so desperately in need of help. I don't work so I have no money to pay for expensive lawyers either. I don't know where to go or who to turn to. Please keep me and my baby in your duas, we are so helpless. JazzakAllah Khair Edited by Muslimah7 - 04 June 2017 at 10:52pm

fais Members Profile Send Private Message Find Members Posts Add to Buddy List Senior Member Joined: 24 August 2009 Location: Oman Status: Offline Points: 344	Post Options Post Reply Quote fais Report Post Thanks(0) Quote Reply Posted: 21 June 2017 at 6:36am
	Assalam Alaikum, I know men use Islam to dominate their women but they fail to acknowledge the fact that a person cannot be a good person unless he treats his wife with love and care. Prophet never hit his wives and shared all the domestic responsibility. Pray to Allah for the best solution. this lailatul Qadr.

Haleema_Star Members Profile Send Private Message Find Members Posts Add to Buddy List Starter. Joined: 18 October 2017 Status: Offline Points: 4	Post Options Post Reply Quote Haleema_Star Report Post Thanks(0) Quote Reply Posted: 21 October 2017 at 1:37am
	Asalamualaikum sis, Contact shaikh ismaeel. His email is [email protected]. he is good at giving marital advice..hes also a psychologist

tryingkangaroo Members Profile Send Private Message Find Members Posts Add to Buddy List Starter. Male Joined: 02 November 2017 Location: United Kingdom Status: Offline Points: 5	Post Options Post Reply Quote tryingkangaroo Report Post Thanks(0) Quote Reply Posted: 07 November 2017 at 5:39am
	How many lawyers did you see exactly? I have been through a few solicitors and sometimes i've found they give advice based on how much money they can make of you. I've had to deal with a visa problem for my wife and one said nothing could be done and wait for the court date .. I spent about �2000 saying they would handle my case... but they just wanted it to go to court so they can charge me for barristers and further representation. What I found out later was that other solicitors said I could have avoided all of this and just wrote a letter to the home office. what ended up being a simple exercise became very complicated and costly on my part. So im wondering if its worth seeing some more? i've found that they all give different advice. Edited by tryingkangaroo - 07 November 2017 at 5:40am