Nur_Illahi, no offense but you sound like the conservative Arabs I know.
Most conservative Arabs culturally, find discussing sex openly a taboo whereas us yankees don't care. I guess its those cultural differences that separates us. In a similar fashion echoing what Martha said, what you feel about oral sex is different from other couples and I don't see how such an act is a violation of Islam or Islamic obligations. If you have two couples involved in sexual intercourse in the privacy of their home and their intent was pleasing each other there is nothing wrong. On a professional level, there is nothing wrong with both partners getting involed in sexual intercourse orally so ling as boh couples remain hygenic and are STD free.
You mention that oral sex puts us at the level of animals. No offense (since you have formal education as you say) we are animals just a higher intellectual capacity. Also, we are the only creatures on this planet that has oral sex. We (other than Blue whales) are the only mammals known to have sex either strictly for pleasure or for emotional attachment, but I'm not sure if the latter is true for whales. As you may know I'm comfortable with the discussion actually because I pretty much talk about it everyday with professionals and friends alike. Me personally I couldn't deal with a woman who is not comfortable sexually with herself because that may be problematic when it comes to sexual romance.Super duper religious women need to chill out.