Losing faith. Need help. Desperate.

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   Hello everyone, I'm a new member here and solely created this account because enough is enough. A bit of background information, I'm an 18 year old boy who's soon going to do his A-level examinations so there is tension/pressure/ stress every single day from every single family member, I guess you all can see where this is going, it's gotten so bad in fact that I'm experiencing suicidal thoughts but can't get myself together to actually commit suicide (consider this as a side question, why was I born without permission but must take permission to die/kill myself? I mean, what if Allah wrote it in my destiny that I would kill myself and of course people who kill themselves are condemned to hell, like really? Allah is just doing this to make an example out of people to fuel his ego or something? Just a thought I'm having.)

But the main thing is that I'm losing faith because things are getting too hard for me, I try to remember Allah but it's not helping. What's worse is that I've completely stopped praying, I used to be so consistent and disciplined in my prayers but everything is starting to fall apart, whenever I try to pray now, I do not feel as if I'm praying, in fact, I always felt that way, I just feel as if I'm moving my arms and legs and not 'praying', like, is there a certain 'feeling' you get or not? Because I'm not getting it at all, it feels so bad thinking this way but that's my current situation unfortunately.

Help would be appreciated, thanks.

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Dusk Hazard Members Profile Send Private Message Find Members Posts Add to Buddy List Starter. Male Joined: 04 May 2017 Location: United Arab Emirates Status: Offline Points: 1	Post Options Post Reply Quote Dusk Hazard Report Post Thanks(0) Quote Reply Topic: Losing faith. Need help. Desperate. Posted: 04 May 2017 at 7:04am
	Hello everyone, I'm a new member here and solely created this account because enough is enough. A bit of background information, I'm an 18 year old boy who's soon going to do his A-level examinations so there is tension/pressure/ stress every single day from every single family member, I guess you all can see where this is going, it's gotten so bad in fact that I'm experiencing suicidal thoughts but can't get myself together to actually commit suicide (consider this as a side question, why was I born without permission but must take permission to die/kill myself? I mean, what if Allah wrote it in my destiny that I would kill myself and of course people who kill themselves are condemned to hell, like really? Allah is just doing this to make an example out of people to fuel his ego or something? Just a thought I'm having.) But the main thing is that I'm losing faith because things are getting too hard for me, I try to remember Allah but it's not helping. What's worse is that I've completely stopped praying, I used to be so consistent and disciplined in my prayers but everything is starting to fall apart, whenever I try to pray now, I do not feel as if I'm praying, in fact, I always felt that way, I just feel as if I'm moving my arms and legs and not 'praying', like, is there a certain 'feeling' you get or not? Because I'm not getting it at all, it feels so bad thinking this way but that's my current situation unfortunately. Help would be appreciated, thanks.

NABA Members Profile Send Private Message Find Members Posts Add to Buddy List Senior Member Male Joined: 13 December 2012 Location: India Status: Offline Points: 867	Post Options Post Reply Quote NABA Report Post Thanks(0) Quote Reply Posted: 07 July 2017 at 2:53am
	Read Quran, don't stop praying no matter what,u are just 18 years old,life just started now,I give you my example,I live in India, Alhamdulillah I m a doctor now,the college I studied my MBBS,in my days only 5 out of 159 students including me passed genuinely others did by leaking papers,you know what??4 years ago I was topper in my theory exams,but hod of gyanecology failed me in practicals because my parents didn't talked to her before exams,it was such a difficult period,but hey who helped me that time,it was Allah, during that period I read Quran,I learned about life of prophet Muhammad Saw (Pbuh)and sahabas,and I weeped a lot after reading their lives because prophet Muhammad Saw (Pbuh) is the best human being but he faced so many hardships in life,he didn't eat many times a day like we do,he worshipped whole night till his leg swell,he used to visit those sick people who used to troll him,and many instances will make u feel that we hadn't faced .000000000000000001% of hardships that prophet faced,so my friend please read Quran,offer namaz,be good to parents,learn about life of prophet Muhammad Saw (Pbuh)and always be thankful to Allah,Allah will grant u ease,plus pray to Allah constantly,recite this dua often-"LA ILLAHA ILLAH ANTA SUBHANAKA IN I KUNTUM MINNAL ZALIMIN",it is from verse 87 of ch 21 of Quran in which Prophet Yusuf (Pbuh)recited this to Allah inside belly of whale,Allah took him out and brought him to safe place.may Allah Grant you success in world and hereafter in Sha Allah

DavidC Members Profile Send Private Message Find Members Posts Add to Buddy List Senior Member Male Christian Joined: 20 September 2001 Location: Florida USA Status: Offline Points: 2474	Post Options Post Reply Quote DavidC Report Post Thanks(0) Quote Reply Posted: 20 November 2017 at 8:42am
	If you notice your faith starting to slip, your faith is strong. Those with weak faith slip away slowly & silently. Taking two steps forward for every one step backwards is the way it is done!
	Christian; Wesleyan M.Div.

abuayisha Members Profile Send Private Message Find Members Posts Add to Buddy List Senior Member Muslim Joined: 05 October 1999 Location: Los Angeles Status: Offline Points: 5105	Post Options Post Reply Quote abuayisha Report Post Thanks(0) Quote Reply Posted: 21 November 2017 at 7:18am
	Excellent point DavidC.