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Longford23 
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Female Joined: 23 October 2017 Location: United Kingdom Status: Offline Points: 3 |
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 Topic: MarriagePosted: 23 October 2017 at 1:13pm |
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Asalam Alaykum,�
I'm 25 year old Muslim female and my hands have been asked for marriage , he's as my parents say as they know him very well (him and his family) he is a practising Muslim with great personality and charactertiscs to which no one in their right mind would refuse. So the proposal is very good.� However, I'm not feeling the marriage I've said no to my parents they've said that I'm crazy for refusing a guy like him and that maybe the shaytan is whispering and making me refuse. The thing is I pray and do lots of dua and I have tried to think positively about this proposal with an open mind and every time I do I just go back to feeling NO i don't want to marry him .. I'm not being stubborn and not trying to disrespect my parents I'm not. I'm a very shy Innocent girl who listens to her parents and I've never said no . But I am now . I've refused soo many times but my parents islamically keep giving me advice as parents would do.� I don't know what to do , I feel suffocated , stressed and I want this all to be over and go back to normal.� Please I really need help and advice |
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fais
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Joined: 24 August 2009 Location: Oman Status: Offline Points: 344 |
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Posted: 27 October 2017 at 7:19pm |
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Dear Sister,
Take my example. My wife married me without meeting me personally. she was in india and i was in saudi. for visa purpose i got nikah done over the phone. she trusted Allah and her parents and now we are together since 7 years with a beautiful girl child. so dont be stubborn.put islam in between and take a decision. your check list should be as below is he a practicing muslim does he pray salah is he capable to take your resposibility does he qualify to attract u as per your perception for a husband. I thing this is what we have in our hands and rest leave it to Allah hope thia helps. regards Faisal |
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Longford23
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Female Joined: 23 October 2017 Location: United Kingdom Status: Offline Points: 3 |
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Posted: 28 October 2017 at 4:07am |
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The thing is I don't want to get married now and I have no desire to .. I'm just not up to it yet. Is that wrong , I don't think I'm doing anything haram or shirk?
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fais
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Joined: 24 August 2009 Location: Oman Status: Offline Points: 344 |
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Posted: 31 October 2017 at 12:29am |
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It is not haram but this is the right age a girl shud get married. i have seen girls who deny good proposals repenting later.hope this does not happen with you.
Regards, Faisal |
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tryingkangaroo
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Male Joined: 02 November 2017 Location: United Kingdom Status: Offline Points: 5 |
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Posted: 03 November 2017 at 10:59am |
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you want my advice from life experience? Do Istikhara, if you dont see anything or dont get a vibe then dont go ahead with it. Im sorry to say islamically people have a really naive view when it comes to marriage. Yes we are muslim so we should get married but don't! for the love of god do it because everyone else says you should. Fais took a massive risk and it paid off but it was a massive risk, Fais congratulations by the way i'm really happy for you bro.
But back to my point! If your not up for it dont do it! but heres a curve ball dont wait to flipping long either if you want to have a family. Im probably not being helpful but I will say keep your heart open and pray that Allah puts you in the right position to be married. |
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Aziza25
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Joined: 04 February 2018 Status: Offline Points: 16 |
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Posted: 04 February 2018 at 5:57am |
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Salam sister,
What are your real reasons for not wanting to get married at 25? Is there something keeping you or you just don't feel any need? |
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Mustafaleek
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Male islam Joined: 17 March 2023 Location: united state Status: Offline Points: 1 |
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Posted: 17 March 2023 at 4:53am |
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[QUOTE=fais]Dear Sister,
Take my example. My wife married me without meeting me personally. she was in india and i was in saudi. for visa purpose i got nikah done over the phone. she trusted Allah and her parents and now we are together since 7 years with a beautiful girl child. so dont be stubborn.put islam in between and take a decision. your check list should be as below is he a practicing muslim does he pray salah is he capable to take your resposibility does he qualify to attract u as per your perception for a husband. I thing this is what we have in our hands and rest leave it to Allah hope thia helps. regards i have read your story so motivate for me thank you brother Allah Bless on you. < id="BFI_" style="width: 1px; height: 1px; display: none;"> |
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asiaummaaminah
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Female Islam Joined: 29 August 2024 Location: United States Status: Offline Points: 1 |
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Posted: 29 August 2024 at 1:35pm |
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It's crucial to recognize that marriage is a partnership requiring constant effort and understanding. When challenges arise, seeking professional help, such as Marriage Counseling, can make a significant difference. It offers couples the tools to communicate better, resolve conflicts, and rebuild trust. Don't wait until problems become overwhelming; early intervention through counseling can help strengthen the bond and create a healthier, happier relationship. |
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