asalamualiakum

My family is muslim so I've practically grew up around Islam. But growing up I've never practiced the religion. But now I will be getting my shahada. But I'm like really nervous. I smoke black and mild (those piped cigars), I tend to swear alot, I tend to get these violent thoughts in my head of just beating a brother up, I drink alcohol almost every weekend, and I'm a mack so I like to date different women. I need advice and all the help I can get.

But y do u need shahada?U r a born muslim, right?But if u have never said,"There is no God but Allah, and prophet Muhammad(PBUH) is his last and final Prophet", then go on, Hurry and say it.

Just as u say it, u will be bound to follow the law of Allah.

In the law of Allah(swt), abusing, drinking alcohol and causing harm to your body(by smoking, taking drugs, etc.) are all punishable offence.And u r right to feel scared just before taking shahadah.

Now let me pause and congratulate u-because ur frightened for the sake of Allah(swt), because u feel u may not be able to follow His law.

Now, how to successfully do what Allah(swt) want us to do, and avoid wrong works?Before I try to help u, let me tell u that u hav got to grit ur teeth and have lots of patience.

Smoking:Smoking cause us harm, something which cause us harm is haram.Take medical help from doctors; there r lots of medical solution of how to stop smoking.In quran, surah al asr, we r informed that those people who have patience are not in loss.So ur patience will be tested here.

Swearing:Well, I use to swear myself, and then feel angry.Swear is kind of automatic:it is really hard to stop urself just in the nick of time.So i advised u to do what I did.I started saying 'Allah hu Akbar' whenever there was surprise, or I got hurt.It was hard at first, but with little practice I mastered it.

Violent thoughts:There is a 'huge' difference between bad thoughts and acting on that thought.So if u think something wrong, or mischiveous, or bad, dont pursue it.Tell urself that it is shaitan(satan or devil)whispering in ur head.Ignore it, and earn reward.

Prophet Muhammad(PBUH) said that if a person makes his mind(niyat) of doing something wrong, and then stops himself, then he gets one sawab(reward).

Alcohal:Drinking alcohal is Haram in Islam.Make sure u dont drink it.

When this rule was revealed in Qur'an, then many ppl were in the act of drinking it.Howsoever, after coming to know of this new rule, they threw the glass away.A man who had a business of alcohal destroyed all his assets without a protest.He favored to live in poverty rather than go against the Law of Allah(swt).What made him turn to rags from riches?It was the fear of God.He fully understood that this life is nothing but a test, and he wanted to be successful in the hereafter.

Dating women:It is again Haram in Islam.The best way to stop urself commiting this error is to get married.

And read Qur'an with transalation.

May Allah(swt) guide us in the right path.Ameen.

Sorry, I took it for granted that he wants to improve...and I have known ppl who become modest after marriage.

Thankx for the correction any way, Jenni.

Ohk Quadiyr, before u marry, do this.Keep fast regulerly.It helps in decreasin the sexual desires.Best of the BesT!

Dayem.

Bismillah,

Your advice besides that was great, Dayyem.  The brother should listen to you.

I have known too many sisters who agreed to marry a brother who was going to change and got burned by his addictive behavior.  Addicts need to reform first. 

Quadir, you seem addicted to women, alcohol, and smoking.  Follow the brother's advice to you.  Also, instead of doing these things, volunteer to do things that will help your community, like fixing things, cleaning things up, building something.  Play sports.  Hike while contemplating Quraan.  Fast and Pray.

Bismillah,

Daniel, I assume a Mack is a Jock.  Anybody?

When we want to change bad behavior that we have, it is good to avoid the places we used to go and the things we used to do.  So it's just an idea to play sports instead of drinking and chasing women.  Any kind of hobby that interests a person could help avoid things that he is trying to avoid.

Obviously, reading Quran, listening to it, attending lectures if they help you and don't just annoy you or alienate you, going on discusssion boards to talk about Islaam and praying and fasting are all good ways to find a deeper sprituality and a stronger moral compass.

asalamualaykum, my advice to you is to go to the mosque and start to pray and ask allah for forgivness .allah will help you just try quiting the worst stuff first such as drinking and ect. you will one day straighten out your life but its not so easy it takes time .so just for now read alot of the quran and try to pray and ask a shaigh for help or advice well good luck

peace