i want to know that if a person after giving divorce to his wife gives her a relaxation that she might not go through the process of iddat even then is it necessery 4 that woman to complete iddat period or not.and is a divorced woman restricted to wear gold ornaments during iddat period.plz do guide me if any 1 has got information about wht islam says abt iddat.and if u dont have information plz let me know about any other certified sight from where i can get the answer.thanx

Assalamu Alaikum:

Islamically, if you divorce you must do iddat for a period of 3 months or 3 complete menstrual cycles. Your husband should not pronounce divorce to you three times at one setting, but should wait the period in between each cycle to pronounce divorce. During this time, if both parties agree you may reconcile. If, 3 months and three pronouncements of divorce pass, then you are irretrievably divorced and connot take this man back as your husband unless you marry someone else and that ends in divorce.

I have not read anything regarding the wearing of gold during the iddat period, however, in one Hadith someone's daughter, I am so sorry I can't remember who and I am unable to look it up right now but I will try tomorrow, was in her period of iddat and she was told to go inside her father's house to wait until the time had passed. This meant that she should not be running around alot in public,etc... Of course, if you have to work this is not an easy thing to do, but Islamically your husband is still responsible for all of your maintenance during your iddat and if you have children he will remain responsible for their maintenance.

May Allah guide you.

Dwanna

thanx a lot dear sis i asked this on many other forums but no one guided me but plz one more question to u.if the husband does not wait for the iddat period to b completed and pronounces divorce three times and after that the lady finds herself pragnant then will the divorce b cancelled automatically or not.plz do answer.thanx

Assalamu Alaikum Sister:

If the husband pronounces the divorce 3 times in a row: I divorce you, I divorce you, I divorce you, then this is considered Talaq Al-Bida  (Divorce of Innovation) and is not Islamic. The Prophet denounced this form of divorce.

If the wife is pregnant at the time of divorce, then she must remain in the period of iddat until she delivers the child. Pregnancy does not invalidate the divorce. The Quran states: "For those who carry life (within their wombs), their period is until they deliver their burdens;..." (65:4) The Quran states if the woman is pregnant it is the man's responsibility to maintain her: "And if they are pregnant, then spend your substance on them until they deliver (the baby): and if they suckle your child, give them recompense: and take mutual counsel together, according to what is just and reasonable." (65:6) "Mothers shall give suckle to their offspring for two whole years, if the father wishes to complete the term. But he shall bear the cost of their food and clothing on equitable terms." (2:233)

Insha'Allah this will be helpful.

Your Sister:

Dwanna

assalam alaikum

                     as u said that the pregnancy does not invalidate the divorce by this do u mean that after the delivery the lady should consider that there is no relation between that lady and her husband and now she should think that she has got divorce and despite of the fact that the husband was bearing all expenses of the lady during iddat even then she has got divorce and other than bearing the expenses of lady the husband has no other responsibility/

Assalamu Alaikum:

If your husband has divorced you Islamically in front of two witnesses the correct way, not just saying "I divorce you" three times in a row, then you are considered divorced and after the delivery you would be free to marry again. Regardless of whether you are divorced or not, your husband is responsible for you monetarily during your pregnancy and for two years after you give birth. After this two year period he would be responsible for the children, if you have a son he would be responsible until he reaches the age of puberty. If you have a daughter her father would be responsible until she is married. This responsibility includes food, clothing and other necessary provisions such as a safe home.

This is made very clear in the Quran, however, unless you live in a country where Islamic Shariah is observed it would be almost impossible to force a man to live up to these responsibilities. But if a man fears Allah and seeks to follow the Straight Path in all that he does, he will do as commanded by Allah and take care of his responsibilities.

If you are having troubles or need help perhaps you could go to your Imam. It helps if you already have this information to kinda nudge them in the right direction.

Salaams,

Dwanna