Family Matter - Wife left Islam but have kids together

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Wife left Islam but have kids together

Printed From: IslamiCity.org
Category: Religion - Islam
Forum Name: Family Matter
Forum Description: Questions realted to familly matter.
URL: https://www.islamicity.org/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=43626
Printed Date: 12 December 2024 at 6:57pm
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Topic: Wife left Islam but have kids together

Posted By: Inshaallah
Subject: Wife left Islam but have kids together
Date Posted: 12 November 2018 at 11:45pm

Salam brothers and sisters,

I'm going through a very difficult time with my wife.
My wife was Buddhist before we married. Long story short, she was interested in learning about Islam when we began speaking. She loved everything she learned and converted, we then got married.
After marriage life wasn't wasn't as she imagined it would be and she hated how many muslims acted.
We have a toddler and now my wife says that she does not believe in Islam.
When we speak I can tell she agrees with what we talk about but she is so focused on her individuality and how religious people "push" their beliefs on others that she changes topic as soon as something makes sense. I know we both know divorce would not make our child happy so she always tells me "why don't i divorce her if i'm not happy" but here is the thing I am happy. I am just not happy that she isn't happy but I feel like she just doesn't want to be to blame so she constantly tries to make me end our marriage.
I'm not really sure what to do. I don't want to split up our child weekly like an object. I want him to have both of his parents but I also want to teach him my deen without feeling like his mom is going to push him the other way.
I'm trying to deal with her with her very carefully as anything I say might be taken as an attack by her.
What do I do? I don't want my child to be raised by a woman who cannot move forward and is so quick to close her mind from conversation. It isn't only about Islam but about anything that we disagree on, it has to become a big fight. I have my guesses why but I don't understand why someone wouldn't want to try to fix this??? I will admit when I am wrong about something and I do much of the time (maybe I shouldn't???) but unfortunately she does not. We've been married for 3 years now and I have yet to hear her say that she was wrong about something (maybe it's cultural? I don't know I feel bad for even thinking that).
I really don't know what to do. I'm not even sure if anyone will respond to this or if it even makes sense but inshallah writing it will help me figure out some resolve.

Replies:

Posted By: Dr. Aslam
Date Posted: 09 October 2019 at 5:20pm

Wa alaikum Salam,

You both should consult a marriage therapist and he or she might be able to help you both out of the situation.

Aslam

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Best Regards,
Aslam Abdullah