Groups : Women (Sisters) - Mother-in-law always wears hijab around me

Mother-in-law always wears hijab around me

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Topic: Mother-in-law always wears hijab around me

Posted By: CuriousMuslim
Subject: Mother-in-law always wears hijab around me
Date Posted: 28 July 2020 at 11:26pm

My wife and I have been married for four years now. We're in our late 20s/early 30s. Both of us were born in America, however, we have South Asian heritage.

One thing that has been bothering me quite a bit is my mother-in-law insistence of always wearing a hijab around me. For example, we would arrive to my in-law's house and soon as I walk in the door, she would drop everything and run to put on her hijab.

I am all for women doing whatever they're comfortable with. However, by her making it a point to always have her hijab around me, it makes me feel like a complete outsider and not part of the family. My grandmother (mom's mom) lived with us growing up, and she would not go to the same extremes

as my mother-in-law. My mother-in-law does not wear her hijab around her son, and there are so many formalities between me and her. In fact, my biggest fear is that one day I'll call her "auntie" instead of "mom"! My relationship with my mother-in-law is completely different with my father-in-law who treats me like his son.

Growing up, I've had friends whose moms are hijabis and when I'd occasionally see them without their hijab on, they'd never made it a big deal. My own mother wears a (loose) hijab and doesn't act this way in front of my sister's husband.

With that being said, am I wrong to feel unaccepted because my mother-in-law insists on wearing a hijab around me?

Replies:

Posted By: semar
Date Posted: 01 August 2020 at 11:01pm

Salam,
IMHO, like you said let her do whatever she comfortable with. Even myself, I have a couple young adult daughters, even it's OK to show my body to her because she is my "mahram", I never wear under shirt in front of them. The something they never wear undershirt in the front of me.
So don't feel offended with it or feel that she don't embrace you as her son, I think she choose more careful approach.

-------------
Salam/Peace,

Semar

"We are people who do not eat until we are hungry and do not eat to our fill." (Prophet Muhammad PBUH)

"1/3 of your stomach for food, 1/3 for water, 1/3 for air"

Posted By: abuayisha
Date Posted: 02 August 2020 at 9:13am

Perhaps there is something about what's being covered up that she doesn't want described to others, and this is her way of making sure that doesn't happen. In other words, protection from "evil eye". Surely you've asked your wife, what explanation does she offer?

Posted By: ElpanosSutra
Date Posted: 05 January 2023 at 6:39am

It's great that you are all for women doing whatever makes them comfortable, but it can be difficult to feel accepted and part of the family when you feel like you're being treated differently. Perhaps you could try talking to your mother-in-law and letting her know how you feel. It's possible that she might not realize her behavior is making you feel this way, and it might be beneficial to have an open and honest conversation about it. If you decide to wear a hijab, at http://www.amanis.co.uk/" rel="nofollow - Abayas uk you'll find an excellent selection of models for every taste, which can highlight your personality and style. Also, here you'll find excellent modern collections of modest clothes for any occasion. Don't deny yourself the pleasure of choosing clothes and accessories that emphasize your individuality.