I've been with my husband for 10 years now married for 5.

We have only actually been living together for 4 years.. before this 4 years he was living with his parents who were aware of me but he was always in denial as far as I'm aware.. I had contact with his sister and she always tried to help us speak to his parents but he always put it off and then life moved on it kept happening all the time until I accepted that it was in allah swt hand and left it like that he was always struggling of not financially there was something else... ie affairs etc so I have been through alot with him I'll take u back to when I first met him I was 16 he was 20 we met each other so randomly and we just fell in love it was fantastic I never have felt like that my whole life for the first 2 years was the beginning of my life he found a lovely muslima for me to stay with and teach me how to live the lifestyle as a muslim women and to be a wife.. and I was never happier he gave me my name khadija... things were perfect. 

His family found out about me and he had a choice to marry me then it didnt work out he said I wasnt capable to live this family life yet as he is big brother etc I had a lot of responsibilities to learn... anyway I accepted that and I moved to my own place it was a shared house I went to work and would see when he finished work and his days off he had a few affairs and after the last my sister (muslim women who I lived with) advised us we need to have a nikkah so the next day we arranged it and got married. 

He never told his family I never told mine few months ahead and things were getting worse he convinced himself he was in love with someone else and he wanted to give me talaq that never happened and he left her so we tried to make things work but I could not forgive him. He was broken hearted from both sides and I suppose in the meantime met someone else in a state of confusion and left me and his family we didnt hear from him in months. 

Finally his sister called me and asked where he was I didn't know either he ended up coming back to me and not returning to his family only speaking with his sister. Then I went to meet his dad and told him everything and he was ok along as he was happy. 

Skip 5 years later and we got our own house he has taught me everything I need to know about our religion he is my teacher above everything else. He was always missing his family but family not speaking with mum and dad for 5 years.. last week he has got in contact with his brother who asked him for help with work and it has led him to go and meet with his parents. He hasnt contacted me for days and I am so worried about him I 5thought that he was going to take me 2with him and he never said that he wouldn't.. but now I have a terrible feeling that hes not coming back. I cant bare this pain as I've been with him for 10 years I'm married to him!! I miss him so much and the pain is over baring I'm performing zikr all the time my 5x namaz  reading quran pak... all I want is my husband. He said he will never give me talaq as that's not what our religion teaches us and they dont do this is there culture. But he said if I'm his wife and if I love him I will wait for him but I dont know how long for we never had kids as I always said he will have a child when we go home to the family but now I feel stuck and trapped.. hes all I have and all i know i dont want to loose him i just dont know what to do