Me and my husband have been married for 5 years together 10 since I was 16 and he was 20.. i converted to Islam  not long after meeting him because of how wonderfully he portrayed islam. He give me my name khadija after he arranged for me to go to madrassa and learn as much as I can. 

He is my teacher and my husband i respect him tremendously.

But here's where our problems lie...

We only have been living together for 4 years a year after we arranged to have a secret nikkah because of relationship problems back then and by making it halal we thought it would be easier to handle.. especially when it come to his family. A few months after he had a really bad time financially and mentally which led him to disappear for a few months leaving behind his family and me. I've had small contact with his sister and one day after 3 months she called me to find out if he was with me and he wasnt so we set put to find him finally I got hold of him after he turned his phone on for the first time in weeks. He came back the same night he had a lot of issues only thing one he never returned to his family he said he couldn't face them after leaving like that and it just got worse for him as time went on he had small contact with his sister but led to no where for the past 1 year hes been really focused on his Deen and has improved dramatically our relationship how ever has gone downhill as he said I'm not on the same page as him.

It's been difficult he received a call last week from his sister asking him to help with some things and he accepted he has now gone to meet his mum and dad etc what I'm so happy about but he didnt take me with him. I accepted he wanted to go alone at first and as time has gone on it makes me question why? 

He was supposed to be back few days ago and he is not taking my call

I'm really worried and I got a text tonight saying if I'm his wife then I should wait forever for him. which I will he is my one true love our relationship has our ups and downs but we truly loved each other immensely once and still do now but I think that he doesn't think I'm fit enough to take home with him. I've holded off having kids because he wanted to meet his mum and dad and ask for forgiveness first and then do things in the right way. Also I may add I went to meet his dad and his mum alone one day and they know about our nikkah and are happy if he is but I feel that he is not happy with me or doesn't think I'm good enough? He wont divorce me because it's not any reason to and his parents also wont be happy with that but I'm scared hes not going to come back? I really really love him so much hes my husband and I wouldn't know what to do with out him hes a huge part of my life but I dont know if I can cope with not seeing him for months on end i dont know what to do or where i stand please any advise is appreciated. Jazkallah khair