Why Did the Chicken Cross the Road?
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Category: General
Forum Name: Humour
Forum Description: "CLEAN" humour only please !
URL: https://www.islamicity.org/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=6965
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Topic: Why Did the Chicken Cross the Road?
Posted By: lovetabuleh
Subject: Why Did the Chicken Cross the Road?
Date Posted: 26 September 2006 at 9:52pm
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WHY DID THE CHICKEN CROSS THE ROAD?
PAT BUCHANAN To steal a job from a decent, hardworking American. JERRY FALWELL Because the chicken was gay! Isn't it obvious? Can't you people see the plain truth in front of your face? The chicken was going to the other side." That's what "they" call it the "other side." Yes, my friends, that chicken is gay. And, if you eat that chicken, you will become gay too. I say we boycott all chickens until we sort out this abomination that the liberal media whitewashes with seemingly harmless phrase like "the other side." That chicken should not be free to cross the road. It's as plain and simple as that. DR. SEUSS Did the chicken cross the road? Did he cross it with a toad? Yes! The chicken crossed the road, but why it crossed, I've never knowed! ERNEST HEMINGWAY To die. In the rain. MARTIN LUTHER KING, JR. I envision a world where all chickens will be free to cross roads without having their motives called into question. GRANDPA In my day, we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road. Someone told us that the chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough for us. ARISTOTLE It is the nature of chickens to cross the road. KARL MARX It was a historical inevitability. SADDAM HUSSEIN This was an unprovoked act of rebellion and we were quite justified in dropping 50 tons of nerve gas on it. RONALD REAGAN What chicken? CAPTAIN JAMES T. KIRK To boldly go where no chicken has gone before. FOX MULDER You saw it cross the road with your own eyes. How many more chickens have to cross before you believe it? FREUD The fact that you are at all concerned that the chicken crossed the road reveals your underlying sexual insecurity. BILL GATES I have just released eChicken 2002, which will not only cross roads, but will lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance your checkbook, and, Internet Explorer is an inextricable part of eChicken. EINSTEIN Did the chicken really cross the road or did the road move beneath the chicken? BILL CLINTON I did not cross the road with THAT chicken. What do you mean by "chicken"? Could you define "chicken" please? GEORGE W. BUSH I don't think I should have to answer that question. LOUIS FARRAKHAN The Road, you will see, represents the black man. The chicken crossed the "black man" in order to trample him and keep him down. THE BIBLE And God came down from the heavens, and He said unto the chicken, "Thou shalt cross the road." And the chicken crossed the road, and there was much rejoicing. COLONEL SANDERS I missed one? |
Replies:
Posted By: Hanan
Date Posted: 27 September 2006 at 1:20am
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Posted By: Daniel Dworsky
Date Posted: 27 September 2006 at 6:05am
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Keeano Reeves: The thing to remember is... ...There is no chicken
Why did the Skin Head cross the road? Because he was stapled to a chicken Nassrallah: I didn't expect it to do that... Chicken: "Balaaakbuc bua Bwack buk auh buk ababuc uk baaawaaak... Which means... "What." One mans sense of Humor is another's Pathology Daniel Dworsky |
Posted By: lovetabuleh
Date Posted: 27 September 2006 at 9:31am
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i think i desserve a star for this! |
why thank you Hanan, 
Posted By: Angela
Date Posted: 27 September 2006 at 9:52am
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Very good. I love them.
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Posted By: Hanan
Date Posted: 27 September 2006 at 10:01am
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Posted By: Daniel Dworsky
Date Posted: 27 September 2006 at 10:18am
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Posted By: Hanan
Date Posted: 27 September 2006 at 10:43am
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Posted By: Daniel Dworsky
Date Posted: 27 September 2006 at 11:13am
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"How can Heener ohne Lipn make the SH-sound?"
Bwaaak? If you add the SH sound indiscriminantly you get a chicken doing a really bad impersonation of Sean Connery... |
Posted By: Hanan
Date Posted: 27 September 2006 at 11:23am
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Posted By: Daniel Dworsky
Date Posted: 27 September 2006 at 11:55am
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Yes it also helps if you have a deep voice and say Miss shMoneypenny once
in a while. AAAAND why did the chicken cross the Mobius strip? To get to the same side. ! by the way Amal--- thank you for starting this thread It's been a total blast. 
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Posted By: Daniel Dworsky
Date Posted: 27 September 2006 at 12:12pm
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Amal is a good luck name. I have two students and a colleague named Amal
and all are very wonderful talented brave successful people. It's like the name Arik only opposite. Everytime I come across an Amal something good happens. Every time I come across an Arik I lose money or teeth. |
Posted By: Hanan
Date Posted: 27 September 2006 at 8:52pm
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Posted By: Daniel Dworsky
Date Posted: 27 September 2006 at 10:29pm
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Sounds like we have more of a Rodger Moore thing happening here.
I'm shorry about Arik but it shounds like you made the right dishishun. |
Posted By: candid
Date Posted: 27 September 2006 at 11:48pm
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Why did the chicken cross the road? Ariel Sharon:- The chicken can be a terrorist. We will build a wall to prevent the chicken from crossing the road. Dan Halutz:- The chicken got killed because the terrorists were hiding behind it. |
Posted By: lovetabuleh
Date Posted: 27 September 2006 at 11:55pm
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LOOL!!
you guys (daniel and hanan) made no sense with this 'sh' business but are helarious!! thanx daniel for the good news, i hope it's genuinely true cuz i'm going through this wierd stage of distress deciding what field of grad school to get into. i'm confused and clueless of what path to take- not knowing where i will end up in the next 5 years. it's really agrivating. i feel like i'm bouncing around like a chicken with it's head cut off.
n e ways, gotta rest. got work early tomorrow.
Salaam,
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Posted By: Daniel Dworsky
Date Posted: 28 September 2006 at 12:41am
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Lool in hebrew means chicken coup. Funny
What good news? Rather which? Grad school? Oy I put my wife through Grad school she was like, bumping into things most of the time but she's a serious FUD now. I am and always will be a musician with more 1,000,000 times more luck than talent. 'Most lucky break is that I love teaching as much as I love performing. |
Posted By: Daniel Dworsky
Date Posted: 28 September 2006 at 12:49am
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Well, second most lucky break. I met my wife when I was 15 years old.
Waited 6 years to marry. Still married. Two amazing children. Now that was a lucky break. I must away to work now to support them, and keep them in air conditioning and diet pepsi |
Posted By: Hanan
Date Posted: 29 September 2006 at 6:32pm
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