Assalamu'Alaikum,

Sr. in Islam if you are married it is the husbands responsibility to do all of the shopping if you are not married than the Father would do it. Unless there is shopping centers for Sr's only. In Egypt the men do all of the shopping for these items if there are men only stores....

Here in the USA I'm a very spoiled muslimah I don't have to worry about anything as far as grocery's, dry cleaning, errands etc...I do go with my hubby on Weekend shopping outings when we need to or when we are going to some of my favorite Arabic shops...

I personally buy all of my clothing niqab, hijab, abaya, jilbab etc etc etc...online there are hundreds of great shops to purchase from and you are able to have the purchase taken directly from your bank account without dealing with riba...If you're looking for such items here is a link of two sisters that have their own clothier business and Mash'Allah their products are wonderful I've been shopping with them for about 3 years and everything is custom made just to your taste from fabric to color to size.... http://www.sewingsisters.co.uk/ - http://www.sewingsisters.co.uk/  and their shipping rates are very low.

JazakAllahuKhair....Mash'Allah very good question!

that too is interesting.. here in Pakistan, where I am visiting it is the same.. Since I am not married and my father is deceased and the men never brouyght my under wear it is a strange thing... women's departments have women working there.. makes it feel safer.. for me anyways

well it is certainly cultural.. I think it iscause the menoften have the outside businesses..and we in the west have bigdepartment stores..often run by men but the workers (sales people) are women.

I would not like to have to buy undergaments from a man.. besides howcan they tell you about how the fit is, personal feel etc.lol 

Assalam alaikum sisters:

Thank u for ur replies.  I was really puzzled by that 'tradition'.  Maybe beacuse i am in ny and it's really easy to find stores only for and with women sellers ... Plus i was wondering if u want to surprise ur husband , how does one go about it ?? I do not want to tell  him ... i do not know ....it is just weird to me...Did not mean to offend anybody!

Thanx

bz

Assalaamu alaikum:

Where in the hadith and sunnah does it state a muslimah shouldn't shop? Or that she shouldnt be a merchant or deal with merchants? Wasn't Khadija, the first wife of the prophet (pbuh) a successful businesswoman in her own right before her marriage?

I prefer to buy my own food. I believe what some of you are referring to is cultural practice. (such as men doing the shopping for the women) Like the women walking five feet behind the men in Saudi. My husband pays for everything household for the most part, I work to pay for the home I own in AZ...the house was mine before the marriage, I own my own things, we own our things and he minds the utilities, food budget etc. We live in my mother in laws house and he is handling things for her. I pay for the upkeep of my house in AZ. We are partners, and discuss things. He and I are both Muslim. His mother is still and has always been a Catholic. Her deceased husband, my father-in-law, was muslim. She handled everything in her household until she became blind. She is a traditional Mexican housewife.

My mother was a housewife that did all the shopping and money handling for our family. She was Turkish and was very good at bargaining with vendors. I think the practices you are referring to is more common in the middle east (some parts) and oriental Muslim culture than in the rest of the Islamic world. I see sisters shopping without husbands in the Walmarts here all the time, and many of these are palestinian american sister and are hijabis.

Who knows? We need to just follow the hadith sunnah and Quran, and put the cultural practices to the side and not call them islamic.

This alleviates a lot of confusion for the new reverts.

Are you looking for lingere but are too afraid to buy it in the stores? You said you wanted to suprise your husband?

If so here are some websites:

http://www.fredericks.com/default.asp - http://www.fredericks.com/default.asp

http://www.hipsandcurves.com/ - http://www.hipsandcurves.com/

http://www.romans.com - www.romans.com  

Aside from the modesty issue I think it's crazy that men sell womens clothing anyway. Unless they are out of this world seamstress, I'm not sure what they feel they could offer?

P.S. You said no men to read this post and this post been read by hundreds of people! I bet more than a third are men!   

Plus i was wondering if u want to surprise ur husband , how does one go about it ?? I do not want to tell  him ... i do not know .... BZ

 I have to tease you here sweet heart!  Why are you shy about it?  You're already married to the man??

hmm....

Some ideas that come to mind are..

Uh.. maybe I better private message you? Some Muslims have a a very victorian attitude concerning certian subjects and some people just aren't getting any  okay let me quit before I get kicked off of here   

Hey check out

Men Are From Mars Women Are From Venus in the Bedroom by Dr. John Gray

Assalamu'Alaikum UmmAminata,

Your posts always make me smile.....

Don't forget meaningless everyday "code words" that you can use around the munchkins.

I like your links.You can find a ton of stores online. Most have very specific size charts so whether it's a brand you are familiar with or not you can find the right size. Many offer free shipping or online only discounts as well.....

Hmmm....

USA-Niqabi pm sister. I don't know any online code words willing to learn though.

Thanks

Miriam

Assalamu'Alaikum Umm Aminata,

Sorry I must of typed it in wrong I meant at home when you're around hubby...for example if you are planning a "Discussion" later on in the evening.....we've done little things like that for years lol my kids must think we debate after their bedtime all night long...one time I heard my oldest say "Just go to bed Mama and Baba have some Discussion planned" LOL...the way he said it... was hillarious almost like the 4 of them were thicker than thieves trying to avoid a possible restriction or punishment....My hubby and I sat down to have our evening coffee that night and had a good chuckle about it.

So that was what I meant I don't know any online words for that and wouldn't want to either...that sort of talk is better left offline and in the home.

one time I heard my oldest say "Just go to bed Mama and Baba have some Discussion planned" LOL...the way he said it... was hillarious almost like the 4 of them were thicker than thieves trying to avoid a possible restriction or punishment....My hubby and I sat down to have our evening coffee that night and had a good chuckle about it.

That is too cute!     

Assalamu Alaikum:

I also think that part of it may be that in more traditional societies... women, especially once they are married, do not tend to work.  Also many of these countries have such high unemployment that if there are jobs available, they often go to men who have families to support.

I know that when we were in Egypt, every shop I visited had women selling to women.  I wouldn't have been comfortable dealing with a man in that situation... and I don't think my husband would have either.  I think it's a modesty issue.  No man wants to talk to another man about what size bra his wife wears.  That's just weird... and that's a private issue between husband and wife IMHO.  (Of course, probably many men have no idea what size their wives wear. ;) )

Peace. :)

Assalamu'Alaikum Um Sami,

Yes...Mash'Allah you are right even in the government department stores when we would travel into Tanta in El Gharbia Egypt they had female sales women in these departments...

But we live in a small farming village Soberbai not far from Tanta.

The Sr's have a good system they go door to door during the day and sit down with the sisters and sell or barter what they need...

One sister would come every morning selling cheese or yeast and trade for milk or eggs....

Another sister would trade water from the families well for some fresh produce...

My sister-n-laws husbands go into the city and buy the fabric from fabric stores on huge hanging bolts and bring it home and we all decide what we need and take it to a sister that sews and pay her to sew for us, or if we know someone with a machine rent it or borrow it from them.....

There is one village not far from Tanta that is famous for it's cotton garments and there all of the sisters sell to sisters so it's a nice day trip to take the bus and go....

But you are right about the employment situation. The sr's I know that are employed are employed in lower paying government type positions....

MasSalaama

I would be embarrassed to death to buy underwear from a man.  My friends would never purchase from a man either.  If the husband wants to buy underwear for his wife as a surprise present, maybe HE should order from an online company.  I love nice undies, but even if I'm in line to pay for them, and a man in in line behind me, I can feel my face turning red.  And I'm just a normal woman....I'm neither a prude, nor a "trollop".  I just don't want any man other than my husband to see my underwear...even if I haven't yet worn it.  The same goes for "feminine hygiene products".  I could just die when I come to pay and it's a man at the checkout!  Then I really turn as red as a lobster.  Once the price would not scan, and this man yelled across the pharmacy, "hey, what's the price for this box of tampons?" I walked straight out of the store, empty handed!

Seems a little perverted in a way for a man to be selling ladies lingerie.  Maybe he has a "little problem"...but most stores in the US would not hire a man for that job anyway.  They would hire him in the men's department instead.

Marta_Akmal asked:

"I have a question....when your in the hospital after the birth and people come to visit, is there a short robe, with maybe a hood I could cover with, or is this something I am going to have to sew for myself?"

You can purchase them in the store.  I had a nice short, terry cloth robe with a hood.  It was great!  I finally wore it out I wore it so often.  They sold them at J.C. Penneys and Sears.  You may want to check them out.......and CONGRATULATIONS on the upcoming birth of your little baby! 

I live in Saudi and it is very uncomfortable and intimidating to have men working in those stores. In Saudi, only men can work in stores/malls. The idea that men should be going into those stores to buy womens garments is absurd. I think my husband would be uncomfortable in a store like Victoria Secret with a woman or man working there. Earlier this month I went into Nayomi...equivalent to Victoria Secret... and this man was walking right next to me, telling me that this looks nice and wanting to find my size. I was mordified. Another time I was in a department store in the garments section and these grown men were in the same section acting like they wanted to buy something but they were just watching what that women were picking up. Thank God, now we are starting to see these stores gradually employ women. They are only allowing women inside and have like a gloss over the glass so no one can see inside. InshAllah, things will change.

As Salamu Alaykum Sisters,

I know this section is for women but enough i heard what i heard and i swear if you could not write only for women please!, i would not be here.Time share that we brothers are also suffering from the same issue only one thing different.In my city Tiffany,Benetton or Seven Hill employees are all young girls over 18 to 24,can you imagine how embarrassing to choose a one thing while they guide inside even chaning in the locker room they  ask after  every 5 minutes, is it ok?,any problem?,shall i see?....

And also me living in an western way of life,on every new year night my mother and her four cracky sisters are coming to the house carrying the red underwears on their hands and saying all give them a luck for the new year...is this normal?

Finally we are all suffering...

Suleyman wrote: And also me living in an western way of life,on every new year night my mother and her four cracky sisters are coming to the house carrying the red underwears on their hands and saying all give them a luck for the new year...is this normal? Finally we are all suffering...

LOL!