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Sunan Ibn Majah 1864 (Book 9, Hadith 20) #31216
Looking at a Woman After Proposing Marriage

SUMMARY: It is permissible to look at a woman one has proposed marriage to, as long as it is done in a respectful manner.

It was narrated that: Muhammad bin Salamah said: "I proposed marriage to a woman, then I hid and waited to see her until I saw her among some date palm trees that belonged to her". It was said to him: "Do you do such a thing when you are a companion of the Messenger of Allah?" He said: "I heard the Messenger of Allah saying: 'When Allah causes a man to propose to a woman, there is nothing wrong with him looking at her'. "
حَدَّثَنَا أَبُو بَكْرِ بْنُ أَبِي شَيْبَةَ، حَدَّثَنَا حَفْصُ بْنُ غِيَاثٍ، عَنْ حَجَّاجٍ، عَنْ مُحَمَّدِ بْنِ سُلَيْمَانَ، عَنْ عَمِّهِ، سَهْلِ بْنِ أَبِي حَثْمَةَ عَنْ مُحَمَّدِ بْنِ مَسْلَمَةَ، قَالَ خَطَبْتُ امْرَأَةً فَجَعَلْتُ أَتَخَبَّأُ لَهَا حَتَّى نَظَرْتُ إِلَيْهَا فِي نَخْلٍ لَهَا فَقِيلَ لَهُ أَتَفْعَلُ هَذَا وَأَنْتَ صَاحِبُ رَسُولِ اللَّهِ ـ ـ فَقَالَ سَمِعْتُ رَسُولَ اللَّهِ ـ ـ يَقُولُ ‏ "‏ إِذَا أَلْقَى اللَّهُ فِي قَلْبِ امْرِئٍ خِطْبَةَ امْرَأَةٍ فَلاَ بَأْسَ أَنْ يَنْظُرَ إِلَيْهَا

TOPICS
proposal  *  respect  *  permissible  *  istikhaarah  *  adab  *  jaiz

QUICK LESSONS:
Be respectful and mindful of others’ feelings and boundaries when interacting with them .
EXPLANATIONS:
This hadith speaks about the importance of respect when looking at someone you have proposed marriage to. The Prophet Muhammad ﷺ taught that when someone proposes marriage, it is permissible for them to look at the person they have proposed to, but they must do so with respect and not in an inappropriate way. This teaches us that we should always be respectful and mindful of others’ feelings and boundaries when interacting with them. We should also remember that Allah ï·» knows our intentions and will reward us for our good deeds if we are sincere in our actions.

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