|
Marriage Trouble!!! |
Post Reply 
|
Page <12345 6> |
| Author | |
Hayfa 
Senior Member 
Female Joined: 07 June 2005 Location: United States Status: Offline Points: 2368 |
 Post Options
 Thanks(0)
 Quote Reply
 Posted: 11 November 2008 at 8:09pm |
|
My duas are with you..
And yes people will "Turn around" and give the face they think they need to show. Some people are really, really smart. Jusy don't be fooled.
Keep us posted so we know you are alright.
|
|
|
When you do things from your soul, you feel a river moving in you, a joy. Rumi
|
|
 |
|
|
raiya16
Starter 
Joined: 06 October 2008 Status: Offline Points: 14 |
Post Options
Thanks(0)
Quote Reply
Posted: 11 November 2008 at 12:46am |
|
Wasalaams sister Hayfa,
Alhamdulillah I am doing alright. Over the weekend my husband attacked me again, but this time I went to see my GP and Health visitor, who recorded the incident on file. They have made an appointmnet for me to meet a lady that works in the police dept, especially to do with domestic violence. They have seen proff of my bruises etc, and are going to advise me on what to do next.
As for my husband, i think he suspects i am up to something, so since the incident he has been exceptionally nice to me... but i am keeping up my guard just in case...
Thank you for your concern, I will let you know how things progress... I have been offered accomodation by a friend if i need to leave urgently. And my health visitor has told me that there is no way he will be able to take the baby, especially because now thay have recorded domestic violence in my file.
Take care,
Salaams...
|
|
|
|
|
Hayfa
Senior Member
Female Joined: 07 June 2005 Location: United States Status: Offline Points: 2368 |
Post Options
Thanks(0)
Quote Reply
Posted: 10 November 2008 at 9:16am |
|
Salaams Raiya,
How are you? Please send us an update as soon as you can.
Sarah
|
|
|
When you do things from your soul, you feel a river moving in you, a joy. Rumi
|
|
|
|
|
raiya16
Starter
Joined: 06 October 2008 Status: Offline Points: 14 |
Post Options
Thanks(0)
Quote Reply
Posted: 06 November 2008 at 4:28am |
|
Salaams Everyone,
I need some quick advice... my husband has started to suspect that i am planning something, even tho he does no tknow what exactly. Because of this he said in order to protect himself, since he does not trust me, he wants me to write a letter saying that under any circumstances he gets full custody of my baby.
Now obviously i cannot do that, but if i refuse then he is going to accuse me of doing something, and say its because i must be guilty of something.
I am hoping to see the doctor on monday and get a reprt to say i have been physically abused. if i do that i can then call the police and demand my passport and bank stuff.
In the mean time, what do i do till then?
He wants to send my child to his parents over the weekend because he is going to be working, and he does not trust her at home with me in case i do a runner...
if he does take her however, i will call the police and say they have taken her against my will...
|
|
|
|
|
samriha
Starter
Joined: 04 November 2008 Location: United States Status: Offline Points: 12 |
Post Options
Thanks(0)
Quote Reply
Posted: 05 November 2008 at 11:59am |
|
i am so sorry to hear this. i my self has the same problem but even worst.my husband has another wife,it's ok .the thing about is that he is scared of because she is before me. they have kids and i have a girl. he is always making excuses not to be around me.i don't know why.it hurts so badly because he does not come oftern.he comes 1 time a week 10 mins,that's all.i cry every day but there is no tears to come out.all i ever want is to be a family and to live a normal life. allah knows.so my sister don't give up. keep on praying and allah will help you.salam.
|
|
|
|
|
Saladin
Senior Member 
Male Joined: 04 September 2007 Location: Sri Lanka Status: Offline Points: 575 |
Post Options
Thanks(0)
Quote Reply
Posted: 01 November 2008 at 8:51am |
|
He is insecure. I dont think he will leave you as he says. He's just seeing that you wont. Baby blackmail is for that. He knows that no other woman would put up with his crap.
|
|
|
'Trust everyone but not the devil in them'
|
|
|
|
|
Saladin
Senior Member
Male Joined: 04 September 2007 Location: Sri Lanka Status: Offline Points: 575 |
Post Options
Thanks(0)
Quote Reply
Posted: 31 October 2008 at 2:51am |
|
Salaam Alaikum,
Yes, i'm a guy but not qualified to give counsel. I'll just give my opinion.
I think your husband is dependent on his mom for concurrence in every issue. He maybe wanting to come out of it but doesnt have the courage. He's totally depressed. Explains the drinking, gambling and mood swings. Reasons could be that he feels he's not being man enough or he may have aspired to marry his ex. Thats probably why he's harassing you, trying to prove who the man is. Whatever, he's made you his punching bag and acting like a sadomasochist. Trying to change him will work only if he's willing to change and you got to know what his problem really is. I dont think you should wait for that. Probably change would come when his mom kicks the bucket. On what to do next, do whats best for you and the baby. I would suggest what the other members did, divorce the guy. Get in touch with your parents and a women's organisation for support. Or like Hayfa suggested contact your embassy.
Pray and keep your trust in Allah. I'll pray for you.
|
|
|
'Trust everyone but not the devil in them'
|
|
|
|
|
raiya16
Starter
Joined: 06 October 2008 Status: Offline Points: 14 |
Post Options
Thanks(0)
Quote Reply
Posted: 31 October 2008 at 1:55am |
|
Slms All,
Another incident yeaterday, but not as bad as it could have been, just some verbal abuse... my husband brought my daughter in to my work to show everyone, but my company is such high security not just anyone can come in, nad we were rushing for a meeting so only had 10mins to show baby to everyone... so i told him i will take her in and bring her out quickly... and oh dear...the things that went thru his mind... he started shouting at me when i got home that i did not want to take him inside my work place because i am having an affair!!! I mean where on earth did that come from!!!
And a friend of his works in the same office, and he has been telling my husband things which are not true...unless my husband is just making it up to try and get information from me...
I have colleagues at work but i have never and will never do anything bad, it is not in my character. I am a married woman, regardless of how nasty my husband is i keep my respect in that way, i would never ever be unfaihful or anything like that...
So now he said once more that he is taking my daughter away from me...and leaving me... he told me his parents are coming tomoro and he is sending my baby back with them...which he cannot becos if he just dares, i will call the police because they are taking my child without my consent, so that is called kidnapping here... they cannot do that at all...
He accuses me of so many thngs, and he was calling me a wh*re as well... i have never cheated or done anything bad...
I don't know if he is insecure about himself or something that he has to treat me this way.
|
|
|
|
|
Post Reply
|
Page <12345 6> |
Tweet
|
| Forum Jump | Forum Permissions You cannot post new topics in this forum You cannot reply to topics in this forum You cannot delete your posts in this forum You cannot edit your posts in this forum You cannot create polls in this forum You cannot vote in polls in this forum |
Topic Options