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Hayfa
Senior Member Female Joined: 07 June 2005 Location: United States Status: Offline Points: 2368 |
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Salaams Sharon,
You know, sometimes one should be a bit distant.. its sort of like, be your dynamic, beautiful self.. really.. its like, let him know he'd be a fool to let you go.. really he would, we know that.Its like pure foolishness.. and you know.. let him know that YOUR priority is Allah, and serving Allah. And that means a good marriage. Either he is on board or not. And if not, get out of the way.. life is very short and you hve no time to wait. You want to share your life with him, but well.. no one can control another.
How many men come back when they realize what they will loose or have lost. Let him know you love him , but you, as a human being deserves respect. I remember this quote by Gandhi,
"no one can hurt me without my permission."
Some poeple just go through these phases.. but he has to decide on his priorities in life. Mine is Jannah, we all forget but we should try to keep it in mind.
And its funny, once people get in this mind set, the others realize you are not kidding. Many get themselves together.
And if all else fails, get out the frying pan sister..
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When you do things from your soul, you feel a river moving in you, a joy. Rumi
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sharonjundi
Newbie Joined: 03 November 2008 Location: United States Status: Offline Points: 34 |
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I have told him how I feel about him.... He knows that I
love him and miss him, but I can not make someone love me. He said that he has changed in the past year and that he wants to be alone. He said it is nothing that I did. He just wants to live him life and be alone for now. I think that is very selfish........... He knows that I love him. I have told him many times. I told him that we should go to counseling. He will not do any of that. I guess he enjoys being by himself. I did many things in the past months to try to be with him. We went out to dinner, to the movies, shopping, and them all of a sudden, he rejects me.......Like the DEVIL was inside of him..... He acted to crazy. Then he asked to come over for dinner for the thanksgiving holiday and I told him if he felt in his heart that he wanted to be with us, hew was more than welcome. So he came over. Then he came over for 3 days after that. Said he was trying to help around the house. Then I asked him why, and that were his intentions on still getting a divorce. Then he said if he had the money, he would have already gotten it. He said that when he came by the house, that he guesses it was confusing me. After I had told him, not to come by and not to be nice to me. So who is the confused one????????? HIM......... This man is crazy. What does he want???? So I decided to just leave him alone and hopely with ALLAH's help, either he will decide to come home or just leave me alone. I know that I miss him very much, but I try to stay very busy so I do not cry everyday. I have my granddaughter, who is 3 years old with me this weekend. So we have been very busy..... She is such a joy in my life. I thank ALLAH everyday for her.... May ALLAH bless us all and you all have a wonderful week........... Please keep praying for me.......... Thanks again, Sharon Edited by sharonjundi - 07 December 2008 at 4:54am |
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Akhe Abdullah
Senior Member Male Joined: 19 November 2008 Location: United States Status: Offline Points: 1252 |
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[QUOTE=Hayfa] Salaams Sharon,
�
You know, sometimes one should be a bit distant.. its sort of like, be your dynamic, beautiful self.. really.. its like, let him know he'd be a fool to let you go.. really he would, we know that.Its like pure foolishness.. and you know.. let him know that YOUR priority is Allah, and serving Allah. And that means a good marriage. Either he is on board or not. And if not, get out of the way.. life is very short and you hve no time to wait. You want to share your life with him, but well.. no one can control another.
�
How many men come back when they realize what they will loose or have lost. Let him know you love him , but you, as a human being deserves respect.� I remember this quote by Gandhi,
"no one can hurt me without my permission."
�
Some poeple just go through these phases.. but he has to decide on his priorities in life. Mine is Jannah, we all forget but we should try to keep it in mind.
�
And its funny, once people get in this mind set, the others realize you are not kidding. Many get themselves together.
�
And if all else fails, get out the frying pan sister.. [IMG>http://www.islamicity.com/forum/smileys/smiley16.gif" height="17" width="17" align="absmiddle" alt="Cool" /> [/QUOTE As salaamulaikum Hayfa Jazakallah Khair for your reply the sister needs to hear that.
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sharonjundi
Newbie Joined: 03 November 2008 Location: United States Status: Offline Points: 34 |
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I will get out the frying pan.......Ha Ha Will that
knock some sense back in him.... I doubt it with this man. He has his mind up that he wants to alone in this time of his life. So I will just leave him alone........... |
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Hayfa
Senior Member Female Joined: 07 June 2005 Location: United States Status: Offline Points: 2368 |
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You know, I a taking this class for certification. And you know some of the method defies my logic.. it really does... noty to go into it.. but at times we must laugh at the absurdities of our lives.
I am a very serious, intense person and I MUST make efforts to laugh.. really just look at life. We humans do the most absurd things.. we are often so self-absorbed we forget to take a step back and reflect. How often do we focus on the innane-meaningless stuff???
I mean really, how many of us are running around in silly, often mindless circles?? I am not talking about those who face serious struggle.. but how often do we make our own lives harder..
i say tell him the bus is going, are you on or off.. if not see ya later..
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When you do things from your soul, you feel a river moving in you, a joy. Rumi
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Akhe Abdullah
Senior Member Male Joined: 19 November 2008 Location: United States Status: Offline Points: 1252 |
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sharonjundi
Newbie Joined: 03 November 2008 Location: United States Status: Offline Points: 34 |
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Hello,
I had a better day today.... I still cry on the way home from work each day, but I am getting better. I know that ALLAH is watching over me everyday and that in time I will be ok. I still miss my husband, but by the strength of ALLAH, I am getting a little better each and everyday. I pray everyday and hopefully things will change. I know in my heart that if it be ALLAH's Will for my husband to come back, that it will happen. I am not duelling on it like I used to in the past. I am moving forward each and every day.... It is still very hard to do, but I have no other choice in life, but to try to accept what has happened and move forward........ It is easy to say this, but in reality, it is so....... hard to do....... Please keep praying for me, that things will change in my life and if it is ALLAH's will, then it will happen soon............. Bring my husband back or either make me such a strong person to keep on going in my life..... May ALLAH bless us all and keep us strong and safe in this lifetime.. Sharon Edited by sharonjundi - 08 December 2008 at 1:45pm |
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Hayfa
Senior Member Female Joined: 07 June 2005 Location: United States Status: Offline Points: 2368 |
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Hi sharon,
My Duas are with you..it is hard.. and that's all we can do is lean on Allah and take it day by day...
Hayfa
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When you do things from your soul, you feel a river moving in you, a joy. Rumi
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