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Pregnancy, Estrogen, and Women
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Angela View Drop Down
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    Posted: 19 May 2006 at 7:42am
Pregnancy, Estrogen, and Women

PREGNANCY
Q&A & more!

Q: Should I have a baby after 35?
A: No, 35 children is enough.

Q: I'm two months pregnant now. When will my baby move?
A: With any luck, right after he finishes college.

Q: What is the most reliable method to determine a baby's sex?
A: Childbirth.

Q: My wife is five months pregnant and so moody that sometimes she's borderline irrational.
A: So what's your question?

Q: My childbirth instructor says it's not pain I'll feel during labor, but pressure. Is she right?
A: Yes, in the same way that a tornado might be called an air current.

Q: When is the best time to get an epidural?
A: Right after you find out you're pregnant.

Q! : Is there any reason I have to be in the delivery room while my wife is in labor?
A: Not unless the word "alimony" means anything to you.

Q: Is there anything I should avoid while recovering from childbirth?
A: Yes, pregnancy.

Q: Do I have to have a baby shower?
A: Not if you change the baby's diaper very quickly.

Q: Our baby was born last week. When will my wife begin to feel and act normal again?
A: When the kids are in college.!

"ESTROGEN ISSUES"
10 WAYS TO KNOW IF YOU HAVE "ESTROGEN ISSUES"

1. Everyone around you has an attitude problem.

2. You're adding chocolate chips to your cheese omelet.

3. The dryer has shrunk every last pair of your jeans.

4. Your husband is suddenly agreeing to everything you say.

5. You're using your cellular phone to dial up every bumper sticker that says: "How's my driving - call 1- 800-".

6. Everyone's head looks like an invitation to batting practice.
 
7. Everyone seems to have just landed here from "outer space".

8. You can't believe they don't make a tampon bigger than Super Plus.

9. You're sure that everyone is scheming to drive you crazy.

10. The ibuprofen bottle is empty and you bought it yesterday..
TOP TEN THINGS ONLY WOMEN UNDERSTAND!

10. Cats' facial expressions.

9. The need for the same style of shoes in different colors.

8. Why bean sprouts aren't just weeds.

7. Fat clothes.

6. Taking a car trip without trying to beat your best time.

5. The difference between beige, ecru, cream, off-white, and eggshell.

4. Cutting your hair to make it grow.

3. Eyelash curlers.

2. The inaccuracy of every bathroom scale ever made.

AND, the Number One
Number One
thing only women understand:

1. OTHER WOMEN

Send this to five bright, funny, wonderful

women you know and
make their day..
WE ALL NEED
A SMILE!! 
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amah View Drop Down
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Allah is Sufficient as a Walee (Protector) and Allah is Sufficient as a Naseer (Helper).
(Surah An-Nisa, Chapter #4, Verse #45)
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Patty View Drop Down
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I loved it, Angela!
Patty

I don't know what the future holds....but I know who holds the future.
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aminah0000 View Drop Down
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Points: 3 		Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote aminah0000 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 10 June 2006 at 5:41pm
thats so true only women on always we only understand one another and men too.
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Angel View Drop Down
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Points: 6641 		Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Angel Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 11 June 2006 at 4:22am

        

 
~ Our feet are earthbound, but our hearts and our minds have wings ~
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mariyah View Drop Down
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O my, sounds familiar!

 
"Every good deed is charity whether you come to your brother's assistance or just greet him with a smile.
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ZEA J View Drop Down
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Points: 224 		Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote ZEA J Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 16 June 2006 at 12:23am

Originally posted by Angela Angela wrote:



Q: My wife is five months pregnant and so moody that sometimes she's borderline irrational.
A: So what's your question?

 
"You will never attain piety and righteousness,(and eventually paradise)until you
spend of that which you love."(Al-Imran:92)
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