second wife

Maryah wrote: Lameese wrote: mazallen wrote: You shouldn't -- unless you are willing to follow every condition set forth in the Qur'an regarding the treatment of second (third and fourth) wives.  It's no accident that Allah (s.w.t) made these so stringent for polygamous marriages.  Besides, polygamy's illegal in every State aside from Arizona and Utah -- and we are supposed to respect the laws of the land .... Peace Actually. polygamy is illegal in all states, although it is done more in Utah, due to the Mormons. But as with everything else, you have to catch them first.   Lameese Asalaamu alaikum: FYI the mormons outlawed polygamy in their church over a hundred years ago. The only ones that have polygamy is the supposed apostate from the mormons  Fundamentalist (FLDS) chuch in Colorado City and Hillsdale. They were "excommunicated" from the main mormons (LDS) long ago. I live in a heavily populated mormon area and have had these discussions with some of the people, that is the only way I know lol... Polygamy is illegal in the US and you would give the first wife grounds for divorce, plus Allah (swt) has decreed that all wives be treated fairly, and they could not be if they could not all be legal. But it is your decision and Allah (swt) knows best. Can you support  2 wives?

Thanks Maryah.  I've given up trying to correct people.  They'll believe what they want.  We still believe that Polygamy when practiced properly is not wrong.  However, God has (in our church) revoked the right to practice this type of marriage because of the inequality and abuse that non faithful men practice in this regard. That is also why the Quran warned its not preferrable unless the man is sure he can be fair to all his wives and completely equal in treatment.

If one married with a pious husband her rights will be assured,but i do not understand why we separated legal and halal marriage between to each other...qur'an's rules is also legal...all we need is to consider on whom we marry with...

Muslima wrote: I would not have a problem being married with Halal. Of course, the point is not to marry a hundred times, and then you chose someone, it is supposed to be the one. But this is not Haram to marry many times in Islam even for women. Of course, it should not be the purpose but a woman can get dovorced and remarry.

As salamuaikum,

Muslima, if you want an Islamic marriage only that's fine.  I know lots of sisters in the states who did this.  They're husbands are still with them and supporting them and the children have their father's name.

As far a husband taking a second wife in the west.  It's still halal.  Secular laws that's contradict Allah's law can never change Allah's law.  What is halal Allah has made clear and what is haram Allah has made clear.   We cannot make what is halal haram anymore than we can make what is haram halal.  Remember this is what the previous nations did and Allah ta'la was angry with them.  Yaqoolu ta'la:

5:87 O ye who believe! make not unlawful the good things which Allah hath made lawful for you, but commit no excess: for Allah loveth not those given to excess.

Salaam

 

Muslima wrote: What if I do not want to be married legally? Just with Halal?

Beloved sister,

"Legally" only means having to do with paper, which has no real purpose in the sight of Allah.  It must always be halal, no matter where you live, how old you are, who you are, etc.  Allah's laws are the only laws that should govern a Muslim.

In the same way, if you want your marriage to be "legal", it must still be halal.