The treatment of women

 Everything written by lovesakeenah is 100% correct. If man does not want to get into trouble then he should give maximum facility in the house to the lady. That will keep her happy. It will keep the husband also happy. In that case, the wife should not make the husband feel sad for anything.

 Wife should look after the wishes of the husband. The house should run as directed by the husband but it should be run by the wife and husband should not stand on her head for every little thing.

 Wife should be given enough funds to run the house and she should have security of living. There should be assurance to the wife of continous living accommodation no matter what happens. If the man makes or buys a house and they have children then it should (if possible) the house should be in the name of the wife.

 It is true that muslims (husbands and wives) both need to be trained according to laws of Quran & Sunnah. Some men try to misuse the wife as if it was a piece of shoe. I will post more soon,Insha Allah,  if I can get hold of the right material that i heard some where.

As-salaam alaykum warahamatullah wabarakatuh

Bro.Israfil,don't throw away the baby with the bath water.Giving up on women isn't a 'solution'.It is a'denial',it's like running away from the 'inevitable.Whichever way you look at it,whether you get married or remain a celibate,you'd have to relate with women in your own family.You must have a mother,perhaps a sister,an aunt a paternal or maternal grannny, a neighbour,a colleague or a fellow sister in faith(like we here even though we don't see physically)&the list goes on.

If you decided to neglect womenfolk on claim of their complexity,what do you think would happen if all women did the same?

It is not easy to get over a hurt,but it's not the end of the world.And just like we agreed that you can't judge "all men" by the actions of a few,the same rule should apply to the women.

Humans generally are a complex being,irrespective of the gender.We live with domestic animals&understand them easily.it's not the same case with humans&that's the way nature has designed it.

Even if you were disappointed in the action of a number of women,simultaneously;it doesn't suffice to say 'every woman is that way.For instance,if you're Asian,you can't judge European women according to the acts of Asian women.And the same goes for Americans or African women.This is not even mentioning the diversities in culture,customs&traditions.Should we delve into religion?You'd realize that it's almost inexhaustible.You would find that a sample of one woman each from all these Continents would differ in characters,traits&attitudes.

If you haven't gone beyond your home country or your country of resident,you can't make a blanket judgement.You shouldn't give up because if every woman was as coniving&unpredictable as you said,other men wouldn't have wives nor would there be multiplication of the human race.

If each woman here also starts to relate their different experiences in the hands of men,you'd feel disgusted&disappointed.

Some men abuse their wives,emotionally&physically.Some women still get the courage to're-marry' after horrifying experiences in the hands of men.They could as well discard that idea&decide to remain unmarried.But you know,life isn't that simple.Some decisions are made not just in 'our own' personal interest,but in consideration of other factos such as family,religion to mention a few.

Am not just directing this post to you,but to everyone who had been forced to make a 'blanket judgement'.We've all in one way or the other had our own share of life's lessons.

May Allah continue to strenghten us&guide us aright.

Am sorry I can't go into details,but I've had my fair share as well.But it hasn't stopped me from being who I truly am.I can't let some ingrates confuse me that ther're no good men around.Though,they might be hard to find.I don't mean to sound controversial,but I have equally learnt over time that even being religious doesn't make anyone "infallible".That attribute belongs to Allah only.I've been privileged to listen to the ordeals of some Sisters&I just had to tell them to take solace in Allah&expect reward from him.

Sis.Hayfa,it doesn't happen in the West alone.But Africans also have youths who have been influenced by the Western world& some,just being who they really are.You're right to think 'all men want is sex,as a teenager'.I mean,that's just what we see all around,till date.Sorry if am drifting away from the main topic here.There're teenage pregnancies flying around like the air we breathe in.And loads of bastards.So,you were not wrong to think that way cos ifwe want to look at it,how many of those 'relationships' ends up in marriage?

"Your statement of'giving up on women' was ambigious&I just assumed,'you didn't want anything to do with women,personally or professionally'.Sorry for the wrong assumption.

Just like I said earlier,the examples you've stated about the'unthinkable things' women do isn't prevalent where I come from.Now,am not trying to be self-righteous here,but I've grown to a point in my life where'disappointments' by humans like myself doesn't throw me off balance.So,the distrust I have wasn't what I chose,but it was a resolution I had to make to keep my sanity as I can't deal with the thought of'infidelity' in relationships.I don't distrust'all the men' I've known in my life,like my father,brother,cousins&the rest.But,I've had my fair share of 'heartbreaks'& I know it might be hard to convince you,but the fault wasn't mine.That am very clear&certain about.I grew to a point of wanting to pursue a career&just live my life without having to worry about someone hurting me,especially when the person in question is a close relation.

Where I come from,Muslimahs marry for the sake of Allah.They bear all the baggage that comes with marital bliss&heartaches,astagfirullah.They hang-in-there.They're not as mean as some women who woud kill their husbands for 'alimony'(we don't even have that).They carry on with life like everything's fine,when it's actually not.I look at some of these women(Muslimahs)&pray that Allah rewards them for their patience&forbearance.

In our non-Islamic world on the other hand,I have seen same women with love&devotion to their marriages.I can't really begin to narrate the very irritating incidents I had been witness to.How I ask myself,"what would I ever do with men,if not for Islam"?I mean,I have seen these things& as much as I agree that women could be deceitful,manipulative&impatient(esp where material things are concerned); I have seen far worse of men&just had to learn to accept the fact that,"humans would always be humans".

I rest my case!!