My depression is killing me

Assalamalikum I can see you still didn't get any answers for all the innumerable questions you have about your life about your iman and your future let me make one more attempt first be grateful to Allah that despite all tests he has given you your still a Muslim and very close to gaining answers to most of your questions on life sabr and strong Iman Inshallah. Toxic and difficult people every one encounters everyday even scholars . some come into your immediate family as your ex wife.and plenty in your extended family your entire relatives look like that hence what you suffered as a child and in your marriage no one came to rescue you .but you have to be on sirat e mustaqim that is straight path which is the easiest one so forgive all of your relatives anyway your wife by Allah s mercy is already out of your life .don't blame your relatives for anything they did or didn't do for you.take these events as tests from Allah .so don't blame relatives when you can't blame Allah.because blaming Allah is a sign of weakness of iman .A Muslim happily faces whatever Allah tests him with and the worst level of sabr is when you hate Allah for the tests then you'll be doing kufr .

Edited by Sultana99 - 22 July 2016 at 12:29am

Your post shows your a mashAllah very positive person.regarding ivf you can meet urologist or gynaecologist again not an Allah's test type but a genuinely good one not a nonsense famous one .if there is blockage and you need procedure or surgery or only decreased count or motility so you need testosterone or medicines and to rule out any factor causing it like diabetes or impaired sugars .ivf is nothing to be concerned about the baby born will still be a blessing from Allah.even a woman may have problems will you counsel her negatively for ivf ? If a child is born normally or through caesarian section to a woman it will still remain coolness of the eyes for her and for her husband

Edited by Sultana99 - 21 July 2016 at 10:50pm

The reward for patience is double of what is lost so Allah gave back wealth ,double the number of children at that age and health back.i feel some people don't ever pass their test hence no reward so their entire life is spent in complaining and quarrelling with others.

ArabicTruth wrote: Brother, Pray to Allah for a way out and repent inside and outside. THEN, THE NEXT STEP IS GO TO A TRUSTED PSYCHIATRIST. Many Muslims might not tell you that, but do it brother, he's met hundreds if not thousands like you. May Allah grant you ease and Jannah.

trust on it ♥ blessings