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Converted American issue with Pakistan husband

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abuayisha View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote abuayisha Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 23 May 2015 at 9:11pm
Originally posted by ConvPakWife ConvPakWife wrote:


My daughter is now saying that since I cannot make decisions on my own and watch my grandson then she will move wherever and not inform me and I won't see him again for long time.


Are you able to make monthly financial contributions to your daughter? Even if small amounts, this will ensure that you see her and your grandson, as well as contributing to their well-being.

Edited by abuayisha - 23 May 2015 at 9:12pm
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fais View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote fais Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 27 November 2015 at 8:00pm
Assalam Alaikum,

Its hard to give a clear suggestion as one who is present can decide who is right and wrong (your daughter or husband) First thing there is no Islamic compulsion on your husband to support your children from previous marriage unless it was mentioned in the Marriage contract. There is no need to lie about your children as he married to you knowing that you have 3 children. He cannot cut the ralation of womb as it is a big sin as mentioned in Quran. When Prophet S.A.W Married Umm Salama, she kept conditions before Nikah. she said I am a ver self respected lady and this may be dislike by you second she has children from her previous marraige.

Prophet replied he will pray that her self respect does not come in between his relation with her and about her children he said he will consider them as his own children. And she accepted his Proposal

So you may give these example but cannot force him to accept their responsibility.
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ConvPakWife View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote ConvPakWife Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 12 December 2015 at 4:44pm
Greetings and thank you all for your replies.
Update on situation is that although everyone from mosque still does not know I have grown daughters, my husband is at a level of acceptance. We recently hosted Thanksgiving dinner and all three of my daughters and parents came. He was sociable to my daughter who he had previous problem with. She and my grandson even spent the night and Eveything went very well.
My daughter is still in bad situation of living with other people. She still associates with people who are not the best morals. I cannot change that but only give her advice.
My daughter has become calmer since that stressful time which makes being around her less confrontational.

I cannot do anything to help her financially since my husband works with the cash flow in home.

I'm sure my husband isn't just with me for the greencard. It's been 10 yrs and he hasn't left me yet even though he makes enough money to leave me a few years ago.

I know my husband may sound like a bad man but he is not. He just chooses who in our local area doesn't get to know facts about my past.

when I first came to this site I was under stress and was fearful for my grandson. Things have a way of balancing out. I can only pray that in time things get righted. I know I will lose some acquaintances at mosque if and when they find out about my children. I will accept it and hope for the best. Inshallah
Thank you again all for your insight and wisdom


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fais View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote fais Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 16 December 2015 at 6:44pm
Asslama Alikum,

My suggestion to you is, try to bring your children to Islam, its a beautiful way of living. Work on your grandchild to bring him close to Islam. I think this way peace will be there in their hearts.

Regards,
Faisal
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